Friday, October 31, 2003

mugged in sch lib today.. felt productive cos i did smthg of everything so in the end, i felt like i do a lot liao.. heehee.. lib is not bad la.. less urge to move arnd n crap unlike in the reading rooms.. mugged till 5+ today den went to pkway with gb.. had wanted to buy wu yue tian album but couldnt find it. tink i got the wrong info maybe.. oh well, shall wait then.. it was raining heavily when we decided to go home.. haiz, now nearing "winter" season rite, days r short n nights are long.. hahaa. bus ride was not bad. apparently, the rain has got smthg to do with the environment of the bus.. erm yeah..


------ Thursday, October 30, 2003

went to sch to mug as usual.. mugged in r3 today. progress was quite slow but uh, okayy la. tink i really cannot get into the prelims mugging mood. tink i over exerted myself liao so now, just cant get into the mood anymore. anw, finished macro pblms today.. oh yeah, went to eat lunch with ed n gb. i feel like a dwarf standing in between them. den when i saw our reflection, it's like a cosine curve with slight damping like that.. hahaa... aft lunch, went to do tj chem paper.. den left for tuition at 4+ with ed. it was raining quite heavily so i managed to get gary chan to come to vj to fetch us..
acty i tink tuition is not tt beneficial liao. i min, is still beneficial la but uh, sort of like diminishing utility cos my absorbance rate is quite slow now.. just sit there n listen.. oh yeah, gary tt lucky idiot went to town today again so lucky me got a ride to dhoby ghaut again.. took nel with hailin.. acty she's a very nice person also la. used to tink she's quite dao tt kind but hahaa, we have quite a lot to talk abt.. she's funny n interesting la. always using the IRAS taxman to "scare" gary chan.. heehee..

okayy la, going to do the tj chem paper now.. tmr going sch again.. me n ed are going to whack the humungous load of physics mcqs tt we have to do tmr.. yipee looking forward to tt. *roLLs eYeS*


------ Wednesday, October 29, 2003

went to sch to mug again.. did phy again in the morn. den tried to read the gp notes on education.. darren came in offering jian lun's notes to be zapped.. thx ya? went to have lunch at the sch canteen.. uurrggghhh canteen food sux. tt's y i seldom eat in sch.. continued mugging.. quite tired so decided to take a break.. OH yeah i finally sat on the dumb garden swing today! it's my first time okayy... *cLaPz* managed to get gb to sit with me..muahahaaha.. was quite nice la, considering the dumb swing has been there for so long n i didnt even sit on it b4.. den after tt we went to the coffee tables to study cos r2 was darn cold.. finished my nov 2002 phy paper n mugged income inequality. fell aslp after a while.. n some dumb person (DUNOE WHO) changed my profile name again..

left for home at 6..wanted to watch holland v cos today, tt idiot ying tian cheng dies.. but guess wat? i missed the part when he got struck by lightning cos i was bathing.. AARRGHH. nvm, will catch it on tv mobile tmr.. just hope the bus i take will have it..


------ Tuesday, October 28, 2003

oh i am so totally into wu yue tian now! i know it's a bit slow la but i'm beginning to really really like their music a lot! my fave is wen rou, then comes a lot of songs like tian tian xiang ni, cai hong, ren sheng hai hai, zhong jie gu dan etc etc.. they are really good. no looks n lots of talent. tt's a good rock band.. yao gun ben shi wu yue tian! hee hee..

anw, woke up at a criminally early time of 7.30am this morn.. went to sch for gp lesson with kan. realised he's really a responsible gp tutor.. yeah n he's damn smart, knows abt everything. got some more ideas on various essay topics again.. tink i'm gonna write on economic growth, rich/poor nations tt kind of stuff, or else it'll be on science n tech..

mugged at r2 aft gp. thought i'll be alone today but i barely started when yv came into r2.. she was studying at the coffee tables with emmanuel, darius n jz.. continued studying n ran into edwin n subsequently gb. den zj came.. den met st, sharon, yj n ht.. wow so re nao.. hahaa.. did physics n nothing but phy today.. finished aj paper 1, 2 n 3 in 7hrs odd.. *wHeW* then went on to do nov 2002 paper 2 but was kinda tired so i went to talk to huiting.. havent talked to tt girl for a long time.. hahaa.. was nice! so many tings to talk abt as usual.. ed, gb n jz came back frm dinner with this huge tub of ice cream tt contains 5g of fats per 100ml of ice cream.. how fattening?! but it was nice.. continued to talk to ht while they played bridge.. continued mugging at abt nearing 8.. mugged until nearing 9 when they came to lock the rr..

OH ed has this zai camera! quite zai cos it can take pictures in different colours by just changing the colour of the filter ting.. eh i'm not very sure but it's zai.. the flash also different colours one.. got "ambushed" by a red flash outside the library n den got "shot" by a yellow flash in the reading room.. quite exciting thou.. just tt u hafta uh, wind the ting b4 u can shoot.. kinda like the old-fashioned kind but still, nice camera! hahaa..

left sch at abt 9.. reached home at abt 9.35... bathed, ate a little den came online again. me going to sch to mug again tmr.. tink sch's a good place to mug la. yeah okayy, will go n complete my nov 2002 phy paper 2.. feel like slping but me hair still wet so ya, go n mug la.. 2 more weeks!!


------ Monday, October 27, 2003

*yAwN*

comp went berserk last nite.. me accompany dad to repair the dumb comp at the hp centre there.. dad needs the comp for his work so we're using the express service, which means i have to rot for abt 2 to 3 hrs here at the customer lounge.. so decided to make use of my time (n this comp) to surf arnd.. brought my econs notes along, gotta mug later if got time. but hafta say, the lounge is very nice.. got comp, free flow food, drinks, free phone to use.. the couch is comfy.. nice. but me hafta wake up early today so ya, *yAwN*

anw, yesterday was normal la.. woke up, slacked around, watched tv, den went for tuition.. went str to gary's hse cos i was early den i didnt want to wait like an idiot at pkway.. tuition was so so.. had tuition with my "ex" kel.. heehee, so nice. but she uh, drew smthg tt's super zi lian on my paper but tt's okayy. she's my ex aft all.. lotsa hwk this week.. i'll try to finish them asap so i can concentrate on maths n econs..

yeah, tt's abt it.. tink i'll stay at home later.. quite tired. tink i'm gonna mug in sch tmr cos i got gp at wat? 9.15am. which reminds me, i haven't do my essay outline!


------ Sunday, October 26, 2003

?Name: lim jiahui
?Birthdate: 8 nov 1985 (8 nov is coming!!!)
?Birthplace: mt elizabeth hospital.. hahaa
?Current livin' in: st george's lane, singapore
?Eye Color: brown
?Hair Color: black/brown
?Height: eh... 158.. NOPE u didnt c it!
?Righty or Lefty: righty
?Zodiac Sign: scorpio

LAYER TWO
?Your heritage: chinese
?The shoes you wore today: yesterday was track shoes cos hafta go sch.. now is barefoot
?Your weakness: i can be a damn stubborn person
?Your fears: needles, injections, being lost (in every sense of the word)
?Your perfect pizza: hawaiian is good.. with lotsa cheese!
?Goal you'd like to achieve: be the best person i can be

LAYER THREE
?Your most overused phrase online: hahaa, okayy.. i always end them with a double letter..
?Your thoughts first waking up: huh so fast must wake up liao ah?
?Your best physical feature: eh? eyes when the double eyelids r visible..
?Your bedtime: 11+, maybe nearing midnite on ave.. can be as late as 2+am on sat..
?Your most missed memory: all the good times doing stuff with ppl whom i feel comfy with, be it shopping, watching movie, slacking or even mugging n lessons (don miss the mugging thou)

LAYER FOUR
?Pepsi or Coke: both.. pepsi cos of david beckham n man utd, coke cos it's a bit nicer
?McDonald's or Burger King: mcdonald's
?Single or group dates: depends.. single is pretty comfy too
?Adidas or Nike: both.. adidas cos of becks, nike cos of man utd!
?Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: eh.. season's lemon tea can? or just tea?
?Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
?Cappuccino or coffee: mocha

LAYER FIVE
?smoke: NO
?Curse: unless i'm really really upset or angry at someone or smthg.. hafta admit i used the f word b4 but nv loudly in front of other ppl.. uh, tink sha heard it b4.. she was shocked.
?Sing: oh yeah, i love to sing
?Do you think you've been in love: with my family, with life
?Want to go to uni: of cos..
?Like(d) high school: is high sch sec sch or jc? sec sch... OF COS! jc... eh, like the ppl, but don really like the sch tt much
?Want to get married: yes
?Believe in yourself: i have to, don't i?
?Get motion sickness: no.. i just slp if the journey gets too long
?Think you're attractive: eh? nah n yah.. depends! ahahaaha.. cos all cedarians r chio!
?Think you're a health freak: somewhat, but i still eat junk food..
?Get along with your parents: yeah
?Like thunderstorms: great for slping in if the thunder's not too loud.. but rain can be.. soothing too

LAYER SIX
In the past month...
?Drank alcohol: yeah
?Smoked: NO
?Done a drug: NO
?Eaten an entire box of Oreos: nope... don really like them
?Eaten sushi: no
?Been on stage: no
?Been dumped: no
?Danced: mass dance only lor
?Hugged someone: yeah, on farewell assembly.. lotsa hugs going arnd..
?Gone skating: nope but i wanna go ice skating again..
?Made homemade cookies: no
?Gone skinny dipping: no
?Dyed your hair: no
?Stolen anything: no

LAYER SEVEN
Ever...
?Played a game that required removal of clothing: tried to but in the end, everyone gave up on the idea
?If so, was it mixed company: no la.. all gals.. it was in sec sch
?Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: no
?Been caught "doing something": no
?Been called a tease: no
?Gotten beaten up: no
?Shoplifted: no

LAYER EIGHT
?Age you hope to be married: 26, 27.. around there
?Numbers Children: 2 of my own (hopefully) + 1 adopted if i'm financially able to
?Describe your Dream Wedding: hmmm.. y do i c a wedding on a beach with LOTS of 5-yr-old pageboys n flower girls? hahaa.. actually as long as it's with the person i love, just the normal affair will be a dream wedding =)
?How do you want to die: gracefully
?Where you want to go to college: eh.. smu
?What do you want to be when you grow up: marketing exec.. hahaa. dunoe la, c who wanna employ me lor.
?What country would you most like to visit: italy, d'uh.. new zealand n greece come close too

LAYER NINE
In the opposite sex...
?Best eye color: brown/black cos they're mysterious.. but i tink blue eyes look gd on caucasians
?Best hair color: doesnt really matter
?Short or long hair: short.. althou takeshi kaneshiro, tomoya nagase all have long hair..
?height: >175! cos i'm short so i want someone who's tall! hahaa..
?Best weight: erm, don be too fat can liao (too fat = like, moses lim? mr mark lee, the ice cream eating champ?)
?Best first date movies? actually anything is fine as long as it's smthg we both wanna watch.. den can have lots of tings to talk abt later..

LAYER TEN
?Number of drugs taken illegally: none
?Number of people I could trust my life with: my family.. which means my dad, my mum n my bro.. 3
?Number of CDs that I own: lazy to count but now i seldom buy.. there's this ting called the burner....
?Number of piercings: EEEEKKKKSSSSSSS
?Number of tattoos: EEEEKKKKKKSSSSSSSSSSSS
?Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: dont rem seeing
?Number of scars on my body: lots.. one in my mouth tt required stitches, one on my knee, some on my legs.. uurrrggghhhhh
?Number of things in my past that I regret: nv tot of it but wat's the pt? life goes on ;>




------

the best

just some random tots that popped into my mind.. i tink being the best is very tiring sometimes. like, everyone expects well, nothing but the best from the best. so when the best hit the expected target n comes out tops, everyone will be like, "this is expected what". true, ppl look up to the best, some may even admire the best, the best gets acknowledged, gets credits, recognition etc etc......

but what happens when the best stumbles? dang, the whole world starts criticising them. everyone wants to tumble the best. so when the best is tumbled, there is a huge great ruckus. suddenly they fall short of expectations and ppl start to doubt their ability, like even slam them. worse, the start to question the way they do things just bcos of that one stumble. i tink it's pretty unfair, the way the best suffers harsh criticism n gets judged by that one fall.

yeah anw, i guess that is smthg like the price of being the best rite? oh well... just quite glad that i am not the BEST, dont have that kind of pressure.. i tink it's pretty scary.


------ Saturday, October 25, 2003

had chem mock today which was surprisingly rather manageable.. rem don tell anyone but i got 5.5/20 for biochem hahaa. considering i didnt study biochem. aft mock, went to find yv as usual. they were talking abt their class trip to bintan.. which reminds me, idah n huiying, ours on no? acty i don feel like going indo, rather go...sentosa! hahaa, at least it's local. i eh, don really like indo.. not racist, just don like the place.. anw, called ling to confirm on prom room stuff.. me going to share room with hy, cheng, lil, erv n maybe idah n ty.. yeah den we most prob going clubbing! so exciting.... heh heh.. ling was tinking of getting drunk.. better hope not.. cant imagine if she's drunk.. muahahaaha..

by the time they finish discussing, i was super hungry.. went to yoshi to eat with yv, wx, zj n gb.. somehow the salmon tastes nicer than average today. maybe it's bcos i was super hungry.. stayed in yoshi to mug cos we have a lot of drinks left.. was damn cold. did some work.. i was at this table apart frm the rest cos i couldnt stand the cold at my previous seat n they were talking abt stuff.. don tink i cannot hear, i just pretend not to hear.. hahaa. but i only heard dribs n drabs la but still, enough for me to grab the gist.. hahaa. i'm kinda amused. yeah, i'm tired aft mugging..

left for home at 4+.. had wanted to go out for dinner but the rain ruined everything.. fell aslp watching liverpool vs leeds. now awaiting man utd vs fulham..

anw, found LOADS of ppl thru friendster! including haiping my fren during the 1st 3 mths.. wow really kinda missed him.. missed his crappiness n all the fun.. but anw, abt friendster rite, i'm sorry if i seem damn dao like i nv add testimonial or send msg.. i want to but i have probs with my comp n all the java script stuff are screwed no matter how i try to alter them under the internet options tings.. my comp has lots of probs now.. hafta wait until the repairman comes alrite?


------ Friday, October 24, 2003

happy deepavali, everyone..

uh, woke up at arnd 11 today, tot it was sunday.. did nth much in the morn.. watched a bit of "the god must be crazy 1". quite crappy. den went to play daidee with my dad n my bro. my hand not good today.. later went to do nyjc paper.. went to meet gb to mug at 3+. mac full of muggers today.. dont have the seats we want so we decided to go to some void deck instead.. at the void deck, it was quite hot initially but yeah, since i was there, the winds started blowing ;> uh studied chem for a while then started to talk.. talked abt some stuff which was quite amusing.. in the end, i didnt do much cos we were talking for quite some time.. all in all, it was quite nice studying at void decks, just tt it's quite exposed n quite hot..

reached home.. dad n mum da bao dinner frm my gran's hse for me.. guess wat? curry.. oh man, how sinful? ate only a little la, scared tt i will have pimple outbreak, get heaty, get fat, which will lead to high blood pressure, hypertension, clogged arteries, heart attacks n eventually heart failure. okayy fine i'm too cynical over curry ya?

tmr got chem mock paper 3.. yeah, gotta study biochem now. hopefully it will be okayy.


------ Thursday, October 23, 2003

scorpio

saw these stuff that i thought are GREAT. it really delves in dept into the scorpion personality, stuff that u dont usually read abt in general astrology. scorpio. yeah, check it out. the more i read it, the more i think it's true n like, somehow i feel as thou i'm reading abt myself.

Scorpio II - (Nov. 3 - Nov. 11)

The Scorpio II personality takes depth as its central image. The days which comprise Scorpio II, symbolically reveal the more serious side of human life, and the ability to go beyond ordinary experience of the internal and external world. Scorpio II people are powerful individuals who are in touch with the dark side of life. Generally Scorpio II's are not in a big hurry. They generally feel that time is on their side and thus are able to wait. Metamorphic change can be affected in themselves and their lives over many years - slowly and unseen. However, those born in Scorpio II must be careful that waiting for the right moment does not itself become the principle activity, a kind of procrastination. The danger here is that such static behavior will lead to brooding, and brooding to depression. During such periods Scorpio II's must beware that their dark side does not come to dominate their outlook.

Scorpio personality: The Scorpio is an eternally intriguing creature who, like the sphinx, seems to know and guard the riddle of life and death. They either fascinate or frighten all of the opposite sex they meet. They are magnetic, lusty and endowed with mysterious powers. They can move heaven or hell with a single look. Nobody could ask for more than they offer.
With no great need for approval, the Scorpio feels completely free to do their own thing. An important clue to understanding them is to realize they trust no one, not even themselves. And because they mistrust, they become fanatically self-protective and secretive about their feelings.
It would be a mistake to think they are indifferent deep down. For their embers, rarely cool. It is much safer to assume they are biding their time until the right moment comes to enter the game and rig the dice in their favor.
They can be a lonely and misunderstood. For in some ways, they are ahead of their time. They are usually out of step with their neighbors, family and friends. It may be their pride that stops them reaching out and asking for sympathy, or perhaps they simply feel mean and nasty and prefer to keep their secrets to themselves.

it is discovered that running close after Taurus, Scorpio is the second most fixed sign in the zodiac, and it is the only water sign that will fight. In fact, it will even enjoy fighting, for fighting is another way for the individual to enjoy a peak experience. War continues partly because it allows people to live at the height of their abilities. The Scorpio, especially, enjoys this. Like the other water signs, Scorpio is sensitive and easily hurt by others, but unlike Cancer and Pisces, Scorpio will fight, often fiercely, when hurt.

Much of the emotion Scorpio feels is extremely primitive and does not lend itself to verbal communication and intellectual analysis. Also, much of its knowledge is not easily communicated because it is beyond most people's understanding. When Scorpios try to communicate what they see, understand, or feel, they are often badly misunderstood. They then tend to keep silent because the misunderstanding that results from silence is better than the misunderstanding that comes from failed communication. Less secure Scorpios may react to the misunderstanding by blaming themselves and concluding that they are rotten inside. Burdened by a sense of inward decay and corruption, they do not realize that the "evil" thoughts they harbor are quite often felt, if a bit less intensely, by others as well. From all this comes Scorpio's reputation for secrecy.


well there u are, the darker side of scorpio. well tink i got a more insightful view abt what i am n what i'm made of.. well, to some extent, i believe horoscopes can help in understanding ourselves n the ppl arnd us better.


------

late night soccer

crawled up to watch man utd vs glasgow rangers at 2.30am.. damn shuang.. very long nv watch soccer in these unearthly hours. man utd won rangers with a score of 1-0 thx to a philip neville solo goal. i tell u, that goal is good. it made phil neville look as thou he's been a striker all his life. then tianhao msged me.. n i tot i was the only person crazy enough to watch it. turns out my kaki is watching too.. thx for pei-ing me man, kaki.. it's great! yeah anw, the match was just damn exciting.. rangers had loads of chances to equalise but man utd's defence stood firm.. it had to be one of the most entertaining n exciting matches i've watched for a long time. good, at least nv waste my slping time.. hahaa.

dragged myself awake at 9+. was so tempted to go back to slp but the need to mug finally won n i woke up.. went to sch to mug today. went pkway for lunch n ran into alex. tt dumb guy so ba gua.. hahaa. yeah, it was nice talking to him.. it's been a while. went back to sch, went for gp.. kan gave us our mock essay test back.. yeah he gave me 32! hahaa, my highest record.. cleared some doubts n got some more ideas on wat to write on those rich/poor nations tingy. quite a constructive lesson.. went back to r1 to mug aft gp.. ran into pj at the stone tables so i went to study with her.. got a bit hot so i went back to r1 but r1 was quite noisy so i head out to mug with pj again.. oh yeah, got pj to teach me how to sing tt song tt she composed herself.. it's just such a nice song.. tt girl is just so talented..

took 13 home.. am tired now. also, am trying to tink of a good place to mug tmr since everywhere else will be festive n noisy due to deepavali.. oh well.

yeah, was tinking abt some stuff just now. actually, it's amazing wat u can know if u just shut up n listen to others talk. but anw, yeah, where was i? oh rite, just wanna share some of my tots.. it works for me n anyone is welcome to try it, maybe it'll work for u too.. when u're feeling down, like when u feel like the lowest person arnd, n ur life is so tough etc, well, acty u don have a lot to worry abt. for me, i tink back to the days in cambodia, the kind of life ppl in the 3rd world cntries lead.. it's much much worse than wat we're going thru now. so we shldn't wallow in self pity. there is no need to stay down for long cos i have a lot in life to look forward to. we shld always be thankful for everything we have n the good life we lead n be happy just to be leading the life we have now. yeah..


------ Wednesday, October 22, 2003

dream intepreted

RUNNING is a symbol for avoidance, caused by any number of things...fear, resistance, not being ready, etc. It can also symbolize a need to hurry, or impatience. You as the dreamer are the best judge of which one this symbol represents in your dream. How did it make you feel? Was this feeling temporary, or was the solution temporary?

got this from dream emporium.. it's a great site.. loads of information. i think my dream intepretation is that running is a symbol of avoidance.. at least, i don tink it's a need to hurry.


------

dream

hmmm had a really weird dream that brought up a lot of memories. the thing is, those are not my memories. eh, how to say leh? i dreamt that i ran home from suntec. yeah den when i was running, i was thinking "this route is so familiar what, i always run one". den in my dream, i ran past this posh restaurant tt's damn funky. n i ran in there, greeted the counter guy as thou he's my long lost best fren, den went out n continued running.. n in my dream, tt route is just damn familiar. when i woke up, i realised i had this dream loads of times. like i always have this dream but i nv gave it much thought before. it's only today when i woke up that i realised i always had this dream. but i do wonder what the dream signifies since i keep having this dream. am trying to find an intepretation to it now..

anywayz, went to sch to find joyce n den mug since home area is damn noisy. bus journey to sch took damn long.. esp arnd the dakota crescent area where they're having loads of construction works going on.. reached sch aft a nice slp on the bus, went to r2, found joyce n yiing n mugged.. ran into ed n gb. mugged with them cos joyce n yiing leaving.. finished inorganic chem thou i still cant really rem everything now.. went home at 6.. yeah, tt's abt it today.

p.s. gb thx for sending me my wonderful voice.. cant stop listening to it! =)


------ Tuesday, October 21, 2003

i've finished uploading another album. so now there's 3: eh, class photos, the photos at pastamania n miscellaneous photos i took with frens after farewell.. go check it out under 'links'!


------

phy prac

didnt blog yesterday cos i was just too tired.. plus a bit lazy also. but anw, i saw this grp of kids from the "david o'connors soccer academy" having lunch yesterday.. so cute! all them were only abt 5-7 yrs old i tink.. mostly caucasian kids. so so cute... but otherwise, yesterday was a boring day.. tried to study but to no avail.. just keep slacking. shit, it's the Syndrome creeping up on me again..

had phy prac today.. dad sent me n yv to sch today.. met genia at the lockers again. funny, we always run into each other at the lockers before pracs.. erm had lock up.. talked to sijia abt gary's tips.. yeah, gary's "not-very-obvious" tips are accurate this time. capacitance really came out but it was do-able. and NO, my circuit did not short-circuit today n there was NO smell of burning rubber n no electrical fire.. but the moment i tried to take readings, julius chan came over n stared at me. at first he just stood at my table den later he bent his head n looked at me.. i got quite a shock cos he looks a bit like eh, an axe murderer but yeah, i got his pt.. re-connected my circuit n got my readings..

yeah, finished d/ling clay aiken's new cd..the songs r not bad la. yv was saying i should support originals but hey, i do support originals k.. if it's robbie williams or jay chou. heh heh. anw, tink tt stoopid gal pressed smthg on her phone wrongly cos she sent a msg repeatedly. i tink got abt 40+ of the same msg.. it's still bombarding my inbox now! arrgh..


------ Sunday, October 19, 2003

future..

was awoken unpleasantly today at 8+ today by gary chan.. asked me to remind them to bring tuition fees. oh man.. wat a great wake up call.. went back to slp den woke up at 11. at first i tot today is monday den i was tinking "hey is monday rite? aey no no, it's sat la.. aey NO, mon. NO NO, sunday..." was totally disoriented!

slacked, watched tv while eating brunch.. left my hse soon after the jolin show ended.. went for tuition, which started late cos dumb gary was late as usual.. today's tuition was with amy, joy n shenlin. went thru rj papers.. this week's hwk is nightmare cos is nj paper.. aft tuition, waited for gary to shower den he sent me, ling, joy n shen to dhoby ghaut. tt lucky idiot is watching movie again.. took nel with joy, dont know her well but we just started talking. not bad, she's a very easy person to talk to.. enjoyed meself on the train..

yeah, was in the car when gary asked me wat i'm going to do in smu. he told me not to take business management cos it's too general.. said i shld take accounting n double in bm. take econs module den nxt time i can further my studies n den specialise in marketing. no point getting a degree in bm cos it has no future. yeah i kinda agreed with him cos bm is indeed too general, but i tink accounting is quite boring leh! n econs is torturous.. but for my future, i cant do a single major in smu.. have to do a double. besides, tt;s the te4 dian3 of smu wat.. having the opportunity to do a double major.. haiz it's quite a headache to tink of my future.. but yeah, tink gary just gave good advice (for once)..

anw, heard some unconfirmed rumours abt phy prac, which i dunoe how true is it.

yeah, i finished uploading another album.. go check it out. am going to upload another album now! =)


------ Saturday, October 18, 2003

not feeling very well today.. had a headache in the aftnn but otherwise, today was quite okayy.. woke up after a series of weird dreams that i could not remember..watched all in on ch56.. n realised the male lead Lee Byung-Hun is quite nice looking.. has the charm la. okayy fine he looks 30+ in the show but i like! heh heh..
slacked for a very very very long time, den finally decided to go and do srjc maths paper.. it's quite okayy, do-able.. shall complete it later if i have the energy..
acty i also didnt do anyting much..
yeah, went to watch man utd vs leeds at 7.. man utd won 1-0 thx to a keane header.. yay. arsenal's playing chelsea now.. hope they end in a draw. den man utd will go top of the table. yeah..
watched a bit of rugby world cup just now.. england vs south africa.. must say it's quite nice! althou i dont really know the rules of rugby but it was so so action packed tt i enjoyed it anw..

tink i'm a bit addicted to uploading pix to the online photo album.. it's quite fun.. shall continue now.. tata!


------

album

yay managed to finish uploading my class pix tt we took yesterday.. it's on the "links" section!


------ Friday, October 17, 2003

some tots

had our very last ct session today. phang just gave out all the necessary documents den he let us slack. oh yeah, his final encouraging parting word was the word "stressed" n how we must persevere on n nv give up cos in the end when we look back, it will be "desserts", which is "stressed" spelt backwards. uh everybody already knew of this stressed n desserts relationship n mervyn had to blurt it out loud but nonetheless, can c tt everyone appreciated wat he was trying to say. come to tink of it, phang is really a very good civics tutor. he's always trying his best to help us (not biased okayy), devoting so much of his time to us, n always doing so much for us. i particularly remembered the one he did abt "wat others tink of u" where everyone has to write smthg good abt everyone else in the class den he went to compile it n printed it out on this card for us. i was sooo touched! n also at the end of last yr when he asked us to write an essay on "wat vj has given me over the past yr".. turns out he is using tt as a reference when he wrote our testimonial.. really appreciates the effort he puts in. n today he said he spent abt an hr on each person's testimonial... such a wonderful civics tutor ya? *tOuChEd*

some tots abt my class. acty till now y our class became so divided after the 1st 3 mths is still somewhat of a mystery to me. oh well, shall not persue it further. but hafta say tt althou we r not a close class, nonetheless, we r still a class. erm, well shall not deny the fact tt us gals really cant stand the "abnormals" (winston n licheng, i'm sure u know wat i min ya?) but we tink tt the rest of u r actually fine. we dunoe if anyting has happened cos it seems as thou there is a segregation amongst u guys but we agreed tt if this had happened earlier, like last yr, we could have given our class another shot. who knows, we can even be a close class! i know it's so so mean but ya........

but anyways, just wanna let everyone know tt i never regretted knowing everyone. n i never regretted being in s64.. cant deny there are some unforgettable times, some funny moments too.. to the babes of 02s64: u ppl r... babes! yeah, no other words.. it's been great being classmates with u babes. hehee..will nv forget all the lec times, some times when we will all skip econs lec 2gthr.. to the guys: yeah, nice knowing u all too.. esp the "normals". (ooH i so hope only the "normals" get to read this.. but if ah, accidents happen, just know tt i dont hate u all. it's just tt we dont have the same frequency) to aaron (or can someone tell him): if u can get the mahjong table, we promise to turn up for chalet too.. hahaa

to my vj frens who do not fit into the description above n whose names are not yv, gb n jz: it's been really nice knowing all of u too.. vj wouldnt be the way i know it to be if u all r not part of it. i tink wat they say is true: when u leave vj, wat u'll remember n miss most is the individual ppl, not the college as a whole.

just tot i'd like to end this post with this poem, althou i know this is not our final goodbye, but i tink it's a very nice poem:

"When the waves are round me breaking,
As I pace the deck alone,
And my eye in vain is seeking
Some green leaf to rest upon;
What would not I give to wander
Where my old companions dwell?
Absence makes the heart grow fonder,
Isle of Beauty, fare thee well!"
-John Milton, Paradise Lost





------

day

had our farewell asembly in the morn.. was quite okayy. the fac caps were disappointing (except for the mr mayo ting.. wonder of the teachers know abt it?!), our batch ones are so much better. enjoyed the performance by dance.. it had me n ling humming the tune for the rest of the assembly. ehz i tot the ice cream eating comp was a failure. not interesting at all. me n ling were tinking tt they shld get the more high profile yr 2s to compete instead of getting yr 1s. aft all, it's OUR farewell can? would love to see michelle ang eating. n put diyana, fontane they all mah. those yr 1s.. nv even heard of them b4. guys... yeah harun is good but would love to see kai yuan competing. maybe he can beat tt disgusting mr mark lee.
me n hy wanted to do mass dance.. ran into yv, bain, wx, zj etc so we all did together. was nice! did frenship dance with yv.. hmmm everytime i do mass dance, i tink of orientation! tt was so fun but like, soooo long ago. pratically danced til we drop today. super exhausting.. geez, tt indicates my superb level of fitness huh? Xo(

went to eat take LOTs of photos aft ct session.. finally have one with our jnr class. took most of the photos at the swing area.. den we went canteen to eat the free ice cream. poor zhebin really looked like an ice cream ah pek. hahaa. yeah, went for chem r. today's chia.. so so too.

aft chem r, went to take some more photos. they were all so interested in my cam.. den went to r1 to play bridge while waiting for kel n yv to finish their gp tingy.. later went pkway pastamania to eat.. the zi lian yv took so many pix of herself, it was unbelievable! only when i tried to download the pix frm the memory card to my comp den i realised there are A LOT of pix of yv. wah... took yet more pix when we were on the bus. hmm tink i'm deserting webshots. i always run into probs there. i'm experimenting with picturetrail. it seems not bad.. will link it when i'm done uploading the pix, which will take a while cos i have abt 80 photos to upload.


------ Thursday, October 16, 2003

pulled myself out of the bed at 7.30 today cos got gp lesson at 8.40. dad sent me to sch today so yeah, can afford to wake up late. went thru singlish n antipathies compre today. was quite okayy la. just a bit sian towards the end. aft gp, had 5 "periods" of break.. walked arnd the sch for a while den settled down to do nov 2002 chem paper 1 n 2. went for chem r.. was robert yeo today. eh so so la. didnt have the ans scheme so was a bit ma fan but ya, got benefit a bit.

took bus with yv n gb aft chem r, den went to mac to mug with gb.. managed to finish nov paper 2 n do paper 3 section A n B. today was devoted to chem.. shall complete the rest of the paper den go on to do srjc maths paper. yeah, must start on econs too.. realised i've been neglecting econs...

tuition this week is on sun at 3pm. he initially asked us to go on sat 4pm but for once, i managed to persuade him to leave sat free cos of open house. heehee. erm yeah, well tmr's farewell assembly n our very last ct session. can still remember the very 1st one at L14. was stunned when i walked in (tink i was the last person to enter), was wondering how come i am in s6, how come so many ppl in full white uni (turns out they're all frm ri..sian)(hehee), how come the other cedarian in my class is one whom i dunoe, how come there're so little girls in the class... den the 1st ct session aft the 2nd intake came in, i was wondering how come genia is in our class, how come still so little girls, how come still no pri sch frens... those were the times. now it's gonna be the last ct session liao.. shall see how it goes tmr den..


------ Wednesday, October 15, 2003

search

a list of what ppl have been searching for that links them to my blog.. interesting man!

Last 20 Searchengine Queries Unique Visitors

11 Oct, Sat, 01:13:53 Google: pix of christiano ronaldo
11 Oct, Sat, 02:59:49 Google: Viggo Mortensen got Orlando birthday present
11 Oct, Sat, 13:01:52 Google: sun xie zhi 5566
11 Oct, Sat, 23:46:11 Yahoo: sun xie zhi
12 Oct, Sun, 00:43:08 Yahoo: shawn yue
12 Oct, Sun, 01:05:33 Google: incubus x-factor richardson
12 Oct, Sun, 08:09:35 Google: christiano ronaldo videos
12 Oct, Sun, 11:40:35 Yahoo: nagase tomoya download
12 Oct, Sun, 16:25:40 Google: Takashi Sorimachi mp3
13 Oct, Mon, 00:58:41 Yahoo: honourable women guestbook in singapore 2003
13 Oct, Mon, 02:54:43 Yahoo: david beckham autobio
14 Oct, Tue, 16:41:04 Yahoo: christiano ronaldo videos
14 Oct, Tue, 18:15:15 Google: league of extraordinary gentlemen-vcd
14 Oct, Tue, 18:17:09 Google: +ants +psychological +movie +exo
14 Oct, Tue, 19:08:32 Google: holland v drama serial sypnosis
14 Oct, Tue, 19:49:19 Yahoo: 5566 pics xu meng zhe
14 Oct, Tue, 23:08:42 Yahoo: shawn yue
15 Oct, Wed, 11:55:57 Google: infernal affairs 2 dinner

ohh someone actually searched "singapore malay gay blog" n got linked to my site b4.. think they must be attracted to my "cutest guys" list ;)


------

counting down... and more

oh yeah, tink i shall do a little countdown here..

3 more days to vj openhouse (18/10)
6 more days to phy prac (21/10)
24 more days to my birthday!!! (8/11)
25 more days to man utd vs liverpool (9/11)
26 more days to first A level written paper (10/11)
29 more days to yv's birthday (13/11)
38 more days to shalynn mummy's birthday (22/11)
43 more days to si jia's birthday (27/11)
43 more days to last A level paper! (27/11)
50 more days to prom! (4/12)
71 more days to christmas (25/12)
77 more days to last day of the year (31/12)
78 more days to the new year! (01/01/2004)


------

.....

went for chem r today.. was quite okayy la. wasnt the most productive but yeah, every little bit helps ya. aft chem r, went r2 to wait for gp lec to start.. went for gp lec.. supposed tp be s1 n s6 in lt5 but the whole lt was only half filled. but s6 probably made up 3 rows man. but the s1 ppl really hiong.. wateva larry choi say they just copy n copy n copy. dunoe copy wat also. in the end my class only me, lil, genia, ll, erv, lc, aaron, jj n tf went. yeah we're not called the slack fac for nth.

went pkway with yv aft gp lec. it ended much earlier than expected. went to buy cleaning solution for my contacts. den went body shop to check out some stuff. walked past anderson's n the flavour of the mth was vanilla n tt yv couldnt stand the temptation so she bought it.. went to mini toons.. checked out the handphone accessories cos my hp really v bare. saw quite a few tt are quite nice, esp got this one in the shape of a foot.. not bad la but then everyting came in pairs n everything had "forever love", "endless love", "love always" etc etc. haiz they shld come up with a series called "jiahui rocks" or smthg. "me" would be better even.. anw yeah, went to this cd shop n yv ended up buying clay aiken's new cd.. rich gal..

had some funny dreams yesterday. dreamt tt "uncle ronnie", my dad's fren who works in swisshotel is actually working in ritz carlton now! den he helped us book a room for prom. yipee.. den another dream was that i dreamt tt i was back in sec sch, training.. yeah tt dream was hazy but i do remember feeling contented. den there was this dream in which there was a reeeaaaallllyy cute baby! so cute, tink it's my nephew or smthg. havent seen my nephew for a loooonnnngggg time. yeah tt's abt it.



------ Tuesday, October 14, 2003

hey ppl, check this out this is super duper funny. saddam hussein rapping "the real slim shady" by eminem. can laugh until u get stitches..


------

bleah

met gb at pkway for lunch b4 the prac today.. had yoshi which was quite nice.

chem prac today is so so ba. the qa is indeed unexpected.. who would have guessed tt organic chem will come out? oh well. but at least there's no deductions to do. i sux at deducing stuff frm the observations. yeah, self design was okayy la. kinetics didnt come out at all. actually i have to say tt i found this prac more manageable than prelims. well i could finish this on time (finished it exactly on the dot). n i found it okayy, do-able. i'm sorry, i'm not going to say "oh darn, the prac is so difficult, the exam board is crazy, i got no time to finish, i dont know how to calculate, basically this whole prac sux" cos this is not true. i'm sorry if u tink tt this prac sux but i dont tink tt way. i tink it's manageable. so i'm not going to lie n say i cant finish, prac sux wateva. u may tink i'm zhuai3, tt i'm a "C grade person", say wateva u want but u know wat? i cant lie to myself n i cant lie to u all. tt will be so fake. so quit trying to give me the horrified n unbelievable look u normally give when u run into aliens when i say prac is manageable. (this goes out to everyone i met today) i hafta say i was kinda put off by everyone just now. oh so suddenly it looked like it's my fault that i find the prac manageable huh? so maybe next time i shld just follow wat everyone said n complain tt the paper is sucky ya? would tt make u all feel better? *i wOnDeR* or maybe i shld just shut the hell up. talk less = offend less. if there're ppl who tink tt prac is do-able is somehow offensive. there i've said it. i feel better now. really. *hIc*

yeah robbie williams got the Best British Pop/Rock Male Artist in the World Music Awards. *3 cHeErS* actually i also dunoe wat exactly it is abt robbie's music tt draws me to him but i always find his exploration of music commendable. like he dares to be different. who else would dare to sing "millenium", "rock dj", "smthg beautiful", "road to mandalay", "karma killer" etc etc? n who else will sing "angel", "she's the one" and "better man" so beautifully? okayy so he may not be the best singer in the world with the greatest looks, the best bod or the strongest voice but he is different. doesnt hurt tt he can sing live very very well. love watching his live concerts.

yeah tt's abt it. am wondering if i shld go for chem r tmr.
reasons to go:
1. there is gp later anw
2. i've done the homework tt they're going to go thru
3. i need to improve my grades. anyone who has ever done chem hwk with me can testify tt my chem grades r tyco. chem prac is wat pulls me up
reasons not to go:
1. eyes
2. ears
3. mouth
4. heart n gut
the 4 reasons not to go r more killer than the 3 reasons y i shld go. shall tink abt it more.


------ Monday, October 13, 2003

explore?

went to mac to mug with gb today. was quite okayy. was tired but i managed to finish quite some stuff. saw this deaf guy who was trying to sell badges to earn money. acty we saw him at novena too. awww aint it a small world huh? dunoe y he's here today. he was selling some soft toys on sat. today sell badges. but anw, he's quite cute.. esp when he smiles. he has very nice eyes! kinda reminds me of keegan kang.. but eh, i only said i THINK he's french. somehow, someone started to really tink he's french eh?

yeah anw, decided to climb the stairs home instead of taking the lift today. decided to kpo a bit so i went to look at all the corridors at all the levels. by the time i reached the 9th level, i found it so interesting tt i decided to climb all the way up to the 16th level instead. yeah, crazy i know. but i realised i have nv been up to the top level in the whole 8 yrs i've stayed here. hmmm n anw, it's a good uh, exercise too. yeah, noticed smthg interesting. the higher i climb (ie frm 11th story onwards), the plants seemed to get taller n taller. yeah, the wateva-shoots actually touched the ceiling on the 15th storey.. 14th storey's corridor is the cleanest.. (eh how to say? my block is like in an 'L' shape. the plants were at the shorter corridor, the longer corridor is the one tt is v clean) no shoe racks even! hahaa.. level 16 is cool.. v windy n the view is good. well, better than mine anw. roof access is locked thou. yeah later had wanted to take the lift back to level 9 but both the lifts were at 1st storey. sian to wait so i decided to walk back down. yeah all in all, 'twas a good eh, exercise. heh heh.

sat's open hse! hmmm *wOnDeRs iF i sHLd fAkE aS sEc 4 sTuDeNt* remember last yr wei siong frm my snr class n some of his frens faked as sec 4s n they came over. they managed to successfully fake some of my frens okayy. n my frens didnt even realise they r actually yr 2s until i told them when ws they all left. hee hee.. so fun.

yeah, tmr's our first real taste of the 'A's. here's a hint but i dunoe how true. kinetics may be coming out for self design. yeah, mug hard, pals.


Now that she's back in the atmosphere
With drops of Jupiter in her hair
She acts like summer and walks like rain
Reminds me that there's a time to change
Since the return of her stay on the moon
She listens like spring and she talks like June

But tell me did you sail across the sun
Did you make it to the milky way
to see the lights all faded
and that heaven is overrated
Tell me did you fall from a shooting star
one without a permanent scar
and did you miss me
while you were looking for yourself out there.

Now that she's back from that soul vacation
Tracing her way through the constellation
She checks out Mozart while she does Tae-bo
reminds me that there's room to grow
Now that she's back in the atmosphere
I'm afraid that she might think of me as
plain ol jane told a story about a man
who was too afraid to fly so he never did land

Tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet
Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
and head back to the milky way
And tell me did Venus blow your mind
Was it everything you wanted to find
and did you miss me
while you were looking for yourself out there

Can you imagine, no love, pride, deep fried chicken
Your best friend always stickin up for you
(even when I know you're wrong)?
Can you imagine no first dance
freeze dried romance
5 hour phone conversation
The best soya latte that you ever had and...me?

But tell me did the wind sweep you off your feet?
did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day
And head back toward the milky way?
Tell me did you sail across the sun?
did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded
and that heaven is overrated?
Tell me did you fall for a shooting star,
one without a permanent scar?
and did you miss me while you were looking for yourself
nanananananananananananana

and did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day?
nanananananananananananana
and did you fall for a shooting star?
fall for a shooting star?
nanananananananananananana
and are you lonely looking for yourself out there?

"Drops of Jupiter" ~ Train



------ Sunday, October 12, 2003

running

run
running all the time
running to the future
with you right by my side

me
i'm the one you chose
out of all the people
you wanted me the most
and i'm so sorry that i'm falling
help me up let's keep on running
don't let me fall out of love

running running as fast as we can
do you think we'll make it
we're running keep holding my hand
it's so we don't get separated

be
be the one i need
be the one i trust most
don't stop inspiring me
sometimes it's hard to keep on running
we work so hard to keep it going
don't make me want to give up

running running as fast as we can
do you think we'll make it
we're running keep holding my hand
it's so we don't get separated

"Running" ~ No Doubt


somehow this song always has this effect on me that makes me think that eventually, everything will be alright.
we'll just keep on running, won't we? and we'll make it in the end
yeah something like that. great song, this is. no doubt is good.


------

prom dress again

had a rather disturbing dream last nite.. woke up not feeling very happy with the dream. hope i dont dream stuff like this again.
slacked around frm the time i woke up till abt 4. den went to re-design my prom dress. met up with yv, mummy, sj, bain, n sj's mum at ppl's park to buy our cloth for our dresses. seems like everyone made changes to their dresses too.. okayy mine is light blue satin with this purplish organza. not bad la.. everyone got the colour they wanted in the end.. mine cost $34.50 an okayy price i guess. so my whole dress will cost around $130. within my budget.. well at least i settled my dress.

reached home, watched stef sun's mini concert. heard her sing yu jian.. was nice. uh, ya nth more to write. am tired now. feeling some kind of weird lethargy. like something is missing like that. acty i tink partly is bcos of my dream. it really is a bad dream. not a nightmare, just a bad dream. darn.


------ Saturday, October 11, 2003

novena

went to novena to mug today. me n gb went first cos yv wanted to slp in. tt place is not bad, quite conducive to mug. was walking around novena square initially. went into poh kim vcd shop. yeah managed to bug gb to tell me his lc intepretation of that shop name. lame.. LC. haiz. den went into some bkshop cos i was attracted by the array of mags there. saw nan2 you3 mag which featured shawn yue. oh n women's world had tay ping hui on the cover.. drool-worthy material! hahaa.
later was contemplating where to mug.. decided to walk over to united square to see. the mac there is not bad but a lot of ppl. in the end, we walked back to novena sq n settled for bk. we were eyeing the comfy seats the whole time n eh, well, attempted to do a not v high class ting. well, is one not-very-high-class-guy suggested one wat.. but yeah, managed to get those comfy seats.

did the antipathies compre. difficult like shit man. i didnt even know wat antipathies meant. whole passage is just sucky, very difficult to paraphrase certain words, like eh, universal human rights.. sounds easy enough but try paraphrasing it la. den went on to do tj paper 2. quite tough.. yv came at 2+.. i fell aslp while doing the data analysis qn.. as in, really slept. had a dream even. but its those kinda flashing dreams again. but when i woke up, i felt disoriented.. at first i even tot i was in reading room. eh.....

gb left to meet his friends so me n yv continued mugging. saw janice n her frens. surprise surprise.. go novena to mug also can c vj ppl.. left bk at nearing 6. went to shop arnd, trying to look for tg again.but couldnt find.. showed yv the mag with shawn yue.. den went to united sq. oh saw this food fest tingy at the basement n yv said she smelt waffers so we went to c. in the end dont have waffer but we saw renaldo's apple strudel instead! woohooo.. my fave strudels.. bought a strudel mini, it's in my fridge now.

split for home.. took the train to dhoby ghaut den took nel home. was super crowded. on the train frm novena to dhoby ghaut rite, there was this disgusting man sitting on the seat, keep staring in my direction. dunoe stare at wat also. like when u look at him den he will turn his head away but u know he is looking at u. eeks. he looked like some pathetic despo.
oh yeah, reach bk station n guessed who i ran into? russell n cheng kang. aint it a small world? actually i saw ck only n i tink he was saying goodbye to someone. den he saw me n i tink he recognised me (he was in my og aft all). den i turned to c who he was talking to n i saw russell's face staring back. tink he recognised me too. so i just pretend i nv see him n just walk la. n all the while he was just walking behind me. wonders nv cease. oh but he cut his hair liao! *wHeW* *BIG wHeW* it was a disaster when i saw him on wed just b4 the gp mock. now it's better, no longer the ah-pek-everyting-also-gel-up style. hahaa.

hmm.. have just decided to watch at least the first half of england vs turkey at 1am. long time nv c becks play liao!


------ Friday, October 10, 2003

thank you

woah.. got a sudden expansion of the links to my blogger fellows.. all recent additions. well yupz, happy blog surfing, ppl :)

anw, was reading thru some of my archives.. realised my life is not tt bad la. can c tt there is a certain pattern in my life n that the same few ppl r always around.. makes me appreciate them all the more.. tink u all know who u are rite? my dad, my mum n my bro, who make me who i am.. 3 ppl whom i love very much. den there is of cos yv n gb, my wonderful pals n of cos mugging kakis ;) oh n jz too.. recent addition to mugging grp. yupz, couldnt have made it w/o u too. n there's tuition.. my grp, sijia n ed who are at the same table as me.. of cos gary-the-idiot-chan whom althou i find irritating, i still have to give him credit for teaching me phy. so yupz, the same few ppl always.. after all, there is comfort in the familiarity ya?


------

abandoned

slept at 2am yesterday, but was awoken abruptrly by my bro at 6+.. call me help him find umbrella cos his is spoilt. best '-_-".. so forced my eyelids open n searched around my room for an umbrella. took quite some time cos u know la, i don use umbrella myself ;) den slept some more n got awoken by gary chan.. changed my tuition time to 2.30pm or else i can go tmr. but i don wanna go tmr due to eh, reasons. uhm don tink i'll say it here. yeah.. so i decided to go for tuition instead of smu talk.

oh yeah, i had a darn funny dream today. i actually laughed until i wake up. i dreamt abt orientation n i was an ogl as well as a yr one. i remember the ogls were doing the friendship dance. i dreamt tt i was sitting there watching myself dance.. so after the opening "you broke my heart, cos i couldn't dance. n you don even want me around. and now i'm back to let u know, i can really shake them down..." den suddenly the song just burst into an indian song n the ogls were dancing weirdly den the stage curtains just burst open n a lot of ppl wearing saris started dancing on the stage a lá indian bollywood movies. it was damn funny. n all the while i was sitting with the yr ones watching myself dance n i kept saying "jiahui dance damn well!" hahaahaaa.. tt's when i woke up laughing.

tuition was fine today. somehow i felt mentally exhausted even thou all we did was go thru ans. tuition hwk for this week is rj paper 1, 2 n 5 n tj paper 2. oh yeah, had tuition with selene today.. was a blast. long time never talk to sel liao :) quite funny. oh yeah, gary's shirt was quite screwed today.. very very comical. eh, wont say it here cos it'll sound quite eh, crude.. hahaa. but i'm sure selene n edwin know wat i'm talking abt.. heh heh. tuition ended at 5+.. went to bk to find gb n yv who were eating aft the smu talk. went back to vj with them. was at the scrabble board when chan walked by. i pretended not to c her but yv said she gave me the "wat r u doing here in home clothes?" look. well wateva.

oh i was watching this zhou wu yue live yue jing cai show on ch8 when my dad was using the comp just now. n they featured edison n shawn! hahaa. hey yv, edison is better okayy. even ur crushie says so. hahaa.. (i showed him the mag during tuition)

yeah, decided to abandon my Plan. cos of 2 reasons. number 1: it's not a good plan at all. in the end, everything will be worse off. number 2: i cant bring myself to carry on with it. that's it, my resolve has crumbled again. but it's okayy actually. i'm not mad or disappointed with myself. in fact, i feel relieved. i tink i've been tinking too much into it. perhaps the ting tt i tot has changed has not changed at all. *wHeW* tt's the result of a hyperactive mind i guess. well there have been some ppl who have been wishing me luck for this conflict. hey guys, tHaNx a LoT alrite? *aPpReCiAtEs iT* it's just smthg i have to do n now that i've done it, i see it for what it was n i guess i've come to take wat i can get. okayy it may not make a lot of sense to u all but to me, it made a lot of sense. yep, i've been feeling better than compared to monday n tuesday =)

the wind has blown over, the tide has passed
i sure hope so
i no longer live in delusion, i no longer live in doubt
i sure hope so
i can reach out to you, i can lean on you
i sure hope so
we will be happy, everything will be fine
it sure better be so

p.s. gb, i may tell them to u someday if i tink it's okayy but now, uh uh. hope u understand. :o)


------ Thursday, October 09, 2003

3rd post

wow my 3rd post of the day.. just got off the phone half an hr ago after talking to yv for 1hr++, with 3 calls frm gary chan in btwn. yipee, v long nv talk on the phone for long periods of time liao.. i feel good! hahaa.. talked abt tmr's smu talk initially den later "diversify" into relief teaching nxt yr, den to dreams, den tuition, den even speculate how much gary earns a month.. quite amusing. yv ah, remember to take ur medicine to cure ur eh, senile condition okayy ;Þ

went blog surfing just now.. went to joyce's, darren's, yiing's, licheng's n winston's blog. noticed they all quite funny. joyce wanted to marry someone'of bae yong joon's calibre, darren's hooked on comics, yiing is another infernal affairs fan, li cheng n winston's stuck on affairs of the heart. seems like everyone is busy with smthg.. left some notes here n there.. hey ppl, really enjoyed reading all ya entries!

tmr going jogging with yv in the morn. hopefully we can wake up. too long nv jog liao, all my fats r showing.. ARRGH. den later go sch for smu talk den have tuition at 5.30. which reminds me, i still havent finish rj paper! damn tt paper is hard can? dunoe which fool (read: gary) says it's quite okayy..

yupz.. tt's abt it..


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yu jian

just d/led n watched yu jian mtv. it's super nice.. got scenes frm turn left, turn right. takeshi!! hahaa. well certainly reminded me of the show again.. nice show!

"他們彼此深信﹐是瞬間迸發的熱情讓他們相遇。
這樣的確是美麗的﹐但變幻無常更為美麗。"
~ 向左走﹐向右走

shit, this cannot read chi too..

"ta men bi ci shen xin, shi shun jian beng fa de re qing rang ta men xiang yu.
zhe yang di que shi mei li de, dan bian huan wu chang geng wei mei li."
~ turn left, turn right

(translation: "they both believe it was a passing moment of passion that brought them together.
although this is indeed beautiful, but constant changes can be even more beautiful.")
eh, smthg like that.


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grrr

was damn pissed just now!! firstly gary asked to change the time again, said he sat got lecture at acjc, cant make it for ours, ask if we can change it to tmr 1.30pm instead. okayy i know it isnt his fault so i wasnt pissed at him (for once). so i asked the rest. shant name names cos not v friendly. but out of the 4 ppl, 2 didnt reply. yeah so how do u expect me to arrange the time if u just don reply? fantastic. den out of the 2 who replied, one of them one moment said got smu talk at 2.40 den got chem r until 11. the other one just keep saying why cannot stick to sat, y cannot later time. IF U WANT LATER TIME DEN ASK HIM YOURSELF! i know it's not their fault tt they have smu talk or chem r or whatever reason it is tt they don reply. but it's DAMN frustrating. SICKENING. aargh every week it's like this. he say one time, i have to ask so many ppl. it's okayy if everyone can make it u know, but everytime confirm got ppl got probs one. den it's like i feel like they don appreciate wat i'm doing! like they take it for granted tt i'll always be the one to co-ordinate tuition timings. if they don have probs, they don reply. den if they probs, they'll keep bombarding.. "do u know if wat time is our tuition this week?" "gic got say anyting abt tuition or not?" "i cannot make it leh. later time la." watzup with tt man? acty i really don mind co-ordinating the tuition times but for heaven's sake, if u cant make it, don make it sound as thou it's my fault tt how come i ask if u all can come at this shitty timing. if u really want to change a time, y don u ask him urself n den tell me later? cos in the end, it's not my freaking problem if u all cant make it. i can just don care. but i'm not like tt. u say cannot, i try to change the timing, even thou it mins msging him n den re-msging everyone again. do u know how troublesome is it? so quit making it sound as thou it's my obligation to help u contact gary. OKAY?

*wHeW* *fEeLs mUcH bEtTeR nOw*

p.s. i don min to slam anyone online. tt's y i'm not naming names. this entry is purely to release my frustration. don go plotting revenge on me.*pEaCe*


------ Wednesday, October 08, 2003

last day of sch (again)

today's the last day of official school.. yay feeling quite happy. no more boring timetables, no more shitty tuesdays! but this will mean we're v close to the As. ooohh.
today's not a good day for me. been feeling cold the whole day. frm morning cold until i get home. but i don feel sick. darn weird. den my contacts started giving me problems halfway thru the day. left eye was super irritated. vision kept blurring. i kept tearing. but luckily it cleared by the time gp mock started. but when i got home n took out the contacts, my eyes felt itchy again. daddy said my eyes were red n puffy. great. by the word "puffy", i felt like a fish. GrEaT!

anw, gp mock was quite bad. don like all the essay qns. in the end i did the science n tech qn. wrote a lot but dunoe whether it's good. compre was quite sucky. how the hell am i supposed to paraphrase the word "happy" when they used "happy, content, satisfied" in the passage? dumb.
took bus home with yv n gb. waited for him to go c tyh abt his hair n get back his pass. talked abt some stuffs abt identity crisis. quite amusing. ahahaaha.

anw, today is day 2 of my Plan. was quite okayy. not much of a success actually but i realised i like it this way. it's like...i think it's the way i want it to be. yeah it feels kinda good. guess in this way, i'm not breaking my own promise n i'm also feeling better. looks like i've stumbled upon a satisfactory solution. *wEaK sMiLe* well now tt sch's over, i don know if my Plan will still be able to be carried out properly. my guess is no. i'm going to fall into my own trap again. yeah, tt's jiahui for you.

yep tink i shld be more optismistic abt life (thou many ppl say i'm too optimistic sometimes) regarding this aspect. tings will reach a conclusion. all will be fine. who knows, it may be a happy ending too! well *cRoSsInG mY fInGeRs rEaL tIgHt* i certainly hope it will have a happy ending!! =)

p.s. guobin ah, u really look younger, happier n more energetic with ur new super short hair. happy??!! YUPZ the offer still stands. i can help u with the remaining hair. bowl n scissors provided! *HUGE gRiNz*


------ Tuesday, October 07, 2003

here

i'm fighting, i'm drowning
someone save me please
i'm struggling, i'm in pain
someone help me please
i'm doing this the only way i know how to
it may seem so juvenile
but to me it's not

i'm distancing but i'm nearing
i'm clinging on to the one thing u left for me
i'm holding on to something that means a lot to me
there's no rationality in this
but i'm doing it
where are you?
please don give up on me
i'm still waiting for you


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nth much today.. just that got quite some ppl tink that i look sick. half dead, lifeless, listless, yeah tell me more. lessons as usual. boring as hell. tuesday sux. BIG time. went to take my photo for the testimonial. liked the windswept hair effect but they say it's for my testimonial, not to seduce the ppl looking at my testimonial. watever. *bLeAh* sch doesnt have any edible food n anw, no time to eat. the first meal i had all day was dinner. how pathetic can my day get? but funnily, i still wasnt hungry. maybe i am getting sick. nowadays i don feel like eating much liao. one n a half meals a day can sustain me. yipee perhaps i shld go live in 3rd world country. forgive me, i'm crapping.
went for lee ba's maths lec n for the 1st time, i actually listened to him today. quite productive, managed to get the answers to the qns i didnt know how to do in the A level maths 02 paper. went for phy double tut. went thru nov01 mcq. damn easy. felt as thou i wasted time again. (not tt i'm cocky abt my phy results but it's really fei4 until he went thru some dynamics stuff at abt 4pm).
was freezing on the bus. changed seats 3 times to get a seat where it wasnt tt bad. luckily i was on the upper deck n there wasnt much ppl. when i got down the bus, i felt like a piece of crap frozen meat thawing in the sun. *roLLs eYeS*

yeah attempted to carry out my plan to internal conflict number one. only gained partial success. well tt's okayy for a start cos i don expect success the first time around. but the great irony in this all is that i tink i'm hurting myself to some extent. but yet i have to carry on with it. it's the only way i know how. so overall, a good attempt today. managed to control, keep a rein over stuff. so many times i almost broke my own promise but i just manage to control myself in the end. i do hope this can end real soon thou. it's like a loose noose around my neck, threatening to strangle me any moment. the worst ting is tt i'm the one pulling at the noose. oh maybe not tt bad but the feeling sure is hard to swallow. PLS pls end soon. i'm not sure if i can keep it up. i'm so going to die.

yeah, decided to give tagboard another shot but this time, i'm using the services frm flooble instead of the tagboard.ca tingy. hope it doesnt kill yv's comp thou. yv lemme know if it happens again alrite?


p.s. yv n gb, phang was just trying another route home yesterday. he took to toa payoh den took train home to yishun.

p.p.s. no gb, i didnt say is "gb saw u one"


------ Monday, October 06, 2003

xxx

realised some stuff today. i am facing 2 internal conflicts. numer one: *alright i was stuck for 5 mins thinking of wat word to use* dunoe how to put it in words. am pondering how to deal with it. got a half-baked idea of wat to do abt it but not sure if tt's the best idea cos there's a chance it may backfire right in my face n leave me feeling like the world's biggest fool. it just seems so funny tt even though i resolve n swear to do smthg, that "steely" resolve (or so i thought) can just be weakened so easily. just one touch n tt resolve crumbles. come to think of it, i do admire dj to some extent. i really wonder how dj coped with it, keeping a distance n controlling. sigh.

number two: it seems like some past nightmares have been coming to haunt me. some stuff that i sorta talk at length abt before. thought it faded somewhat but seems like it's back. not as bad as before but nonetheless, it's back to an extent. this one i really dunoe wat to do abt it. i'm not the kind who will confront it in the face cos 1. i dunoe how to do it n 2. i don tink it can even be done. i dunoe if i shld try to find out a way to combat it. perhaps i shld just accept it n learn to live with it. perhaps this will just be how my life will be. i tink it can be put this way. i am searching for an answer. And i dunoe where to find them.

have u ever felt this way
where u can be around so many others
but yet feel like the loneliest soul on earth
have u ever felt this way
where u can appear to be so happy
but yet feel so sad....
just wondering.


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day was so so i guess. u win some, u lose some. had econs first thing in the morn. not bad, got a B for econs. really didnt expect it. alrite to tell the truth, i wasn't exactly fretting abt this econs result cos i expected a lousy grade. so since my chem got a decent grade, just use it as one of my 3 subs la. oh i dont mean to sound cocky okayy. i'm not ya-ya over my results now cos i truly tink some of my results r quite tyco.

day proceeded normally i guess. aft sch, went with pkway with cheng to accompany her to buy adeline's prez. yv msged to say she n bain r at mos. went to meet them aft we bought ade's prez. was intending to leave pkway when we ran into gb. really gave me a shock. went to bk to join him, ed n wz n end up mugging there instead. progress was slow. just couldnt bring myself to concentrate properly. tired n sian.

left bk at abt 6. saw phang on the bus. was surprised. wondering where he going.
tmr lessons until 4.10. double physics. damn sian. wonder if phang will bliv if i say i sick again.

p.s. yv n gb, sorrie if i looked damn buay song n listless just now. i'm just tired alrite. thx for ya concern.


------ Sunday, October 05, 2003

yay rectified the problem =)
fyi, the pic in the background is added by yours truly, and it's a pic of the milky way near the southern cross, wherever that place is la huh.


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new layout again

changed the layout again. cos i think tt the old layout, thou nice, has problems as somehow it cannot display CAPITAL LETTERS n chinese words. well i deem those as vital and hence the change. dang, this layout has its own problems too, aint it? shall hafta figure out how to rectify it then.. well i do like the black and grey feel of this blog, hence i chose it.

sundays seem to have fallen into somewhat of a routine for me. wake up at 11, watched tv at 12, slack around, then mug for a while and proceed to use comp and slack some more. i do hope sundays have more variety to it but it just seems kinda impossible now. hmm.. 2 more months to freedom, just 2 more months!


------ Saturday, October 04, 2003

back to mugging

woke up at 9.30 after pressing the snooze on my hp once.. dad sent me to tuition todae.. very shuang, dont have to rot on the bus.. tuition today got 4 other pjc ppl who came late n thus tuition started late. went thru vj prelims paper 1 n the dc circuit qn frm p3. den he gave us 5 stacks of hwk.. nov02 paper, tj p1, tj p3 n rj p3. we're supposed to finish them by next week. yay...... yucks.


had wanted to go n take my passport size photos aft tuition but dad offered to take for me at night so yay, saved the time n money. later went to mac to mug with gb.. am quite productive, managed to finish some stuff tt i set out to do. am really tired after mugging. tink i've lost the momentum to be able to mug for hrs at a go liao.. must slowly regain the momentum now.


yeah i tink "my immortal" by evanescence is really a nice song.. had wanted to post the lyrics but seems like someone beat me to it liao.. oh well.


------ Friday, October 03, 2003

nodding off.. comfy slp

went to school today only to find only 3 gals came. me, ervelyn n genia. am surprised cheng n hy pon. am surprised genia came. she's surprised i came. but i told her i'm leaving after econs so she said she's going off too. left with jason. she came for nothing hahaa. went for econs. lbm nv fail to shock me. todae i was the first to reach the classroom since the other 5 gals r missing.. den lbm started to talk to me, ask how's my study, if i got an A for maths... tot she's going to reveal to me how i did for econs but no la, later she said she havent got the results yet cos marking deadline is fri 1pm.. tut is as expected, the cost benefit analysis lesson was nothing much.. could have read it myself.


left aft econs so effectively, erv was the only gal in maths n phy tut. dunoe wat phang tot but cheng just msged to say phang ask us to go take passport size photo, no mention if phang was angry. tink phang expected it cos yesterday he was saying "i know a lot of u are considering doing disappearing acts tmr..." n he looked at the front row... the 7 of us la. well we proved him rite. hahaa.


aft econs, went to canteen to find yv den we went to bugis to meet up with some other ppl. they wanted to go bbmac to mug.. nv been there b4. but in the end me, yv n gb went shopping instead. walked arnd bugis trying to look for tg so tt yv can try for the feel of the a-line bottom she wants. didnt manage to find nice ones. instead, we managed to find some shirts for gb instead.. got him to try some stuff on, which wasn't too bad la. went to the ties section n had a great time picking out some really nice ties for gb.. (oKaYy some of the ties were super gaudy but we deliberately picked them anw)


yup den later decided to come my hse to watch infernal affairs 1 instead of joining the rest at bbmac. had wanted to play mj but my bro is having his final yr exams. both of them so lousy, fell aslp halfway. yv only slept for a while but tt gb, slept like nobody's business like tt.. but poor ting, cos he was squeezed into this little corner but he still seems quite comfy.. they say my room is comfy to slp in. okayy so i'm tinking of opening a sleep clinic. if u're suffering frm insomnia, over-slping, nightmares or any other slp disorders, just let me know.. for a ahem, small fee, u can come.. ahahaaha. anw later when gb woke up, tt idiot was holding on to the throw pillow i hug to slp.. argh how am i going to hug it tonite? hafta wash with dettol 1st.. hahaa. den we all got into a pillow fight.. quite amusing cos it was 2 on 1.. den we played a bit of dummy bridge den they left..


oh yv, i'm sorrie to tell u but i slept thru abt 15 mins of holland v todae again.. sorrie..
later, went downstairs to meet gb to pass him his mp3 player n got to change his profile name instead.. hahaa. good trade..


okayy tmr i will start mugging again.. gonna start with tuition at 11 den later tink i'm going to finish all the hwk tt i hafta clear for nxt week. sigh it's tt routine again.. but somehow, it's a little comforting in the sense tt it;s smthg i'm familiar with. okayy maybe not comforting but.. dunoe how to describe but it's like comfort in the "familiarity" u know? okayy fine i'm weird.............


------ Thursday, October 02, 2003

infernal affairs

hmmm had wanted to pon econs tut today but lbm saw me when i went to the toilet.. she was smiling at me some more, i got quite a shock! so i put on a face like i got very serious cramps like tt in case i still want to pon but yet she still smile at me.. freaky!! but in the end, i still went for the dumb tutorial.. wasted my time listen to her talk about some externalities stuff..


aft sch, went to look for yv they all but i saw phang in the class so i thought they're still having lessons but turns out they're not.. haiz. they wanted to go my hse to play mj initially but my bro having final yr exams so dunoe if he's at home or not.. ended up chatting in the classroom for quite some time. decided to go ps to watch infernal affairs.. yay i'm very happy everyone decided to watch it.. got my edison chen! hahaa.. acty come to think of it, must thank ed n zj for helping me to influence yv n gb.. went to ps n accompanied yv to eat lunch.. later we went to spotlight again.. me n yv wanted to show zj the colour we want to use for our prom dress. den later we went to look at the fashion mags.. saw some eh, interesting designs tt the guys can use for their suits if they are really that desperate.. hahaa..


went to watch infernal affairs.. it's a good show! okayy not as good as infernal affairs 1 but it's good nonetheless. even ed says so.. so we r the normal ppl. edison is just so cute! n so too is shawn yue! i've never seen shawn yue before but aft this show, he makes my list ;) actually wu zhen yu is quite nice-looking too. has his own charm.. was amused to see tay ping hui in the show.. not bad, 3-in-1.. ahahaaha. no but seriously, this show has it's merits too besides the array of cute guys.. the story is not bad. althou ya, part 1 is better..


went home with gb.. on the bus, there were a lot of eh, indians.. dunoe how come also. reached home at abt the same time as my daddy.. watched holland v (the show is getting more boring, in fact, i've slept thru 3 consecutive episodes liao) den had dinner with daddy.. he was telling me abt the army, stuff abt bmtc, enlistments, ocs n the commandos. dunoe y also.. but it's eh, quite relevant since most of the 18 yr old guys i know will be entering ns soon....


p.s. gb, keep the pig n treat it with care alrite. it's supposed to eh, bring u luck. hahaaaaaa


------ Wednesday, October 01, 2003

one up

early in the morn, i discovered that we don have assembly today so i took the chance to ask hy, joyce, lil n cheng for their opinions for my prom dress.. hafta say it's a very constructive talk. lots of comments and suggestions given to me. later when we were going into lt5, i ran into bain n subsequently, hongyi, kel n yv. so i asked them to help me see thru the prom dress ideas too n got some more constructive comments. thanx a lot, gals!
pon maths lec so i got 2 breaks at a go.. didnt feel like doing work so i got down to drawing my prom dress instead. hmmm it's a combo of everyone's suggestions. hahaa i tink my art has indeed improved. althou there were comments that the figurine i drew looked flat n stick-like. finished drawing during gp.. quite proud of myself.. n den got some children's day sms frm some one.. darren ng, well done......... happy children's day to u too alrite? =p


aft sch, went with yv, zj n hy to upper serangoon sc to sj's mum there to tailor my prom dress.. met up with bain, mansi, sj n mummy there.. fyi, i'm making a halter dress, so is bain but our style is quite diff.. mummy making speg n yv is making tg. hmmm we're going to buy the cloths sometime next week. so exciting! hahaa.. took our measurements todae.. now got 7 more ppl (incl yv) know my waist size liao.. but realised i've slimmed down a little little bit.. alrite! hahaa..
went with yv to spotlight at ps to check out some cloths n colours.. went to the evening wear cloth section n practically turned the place upside down.. in the end, yv liked this light pruple satin with pink pearl organza while i liked this blue satin with white pearl organza.. nice nice! hahaa.. so fun..


haiz, think i have slacked enough liao la.. should get down to doing work again. tink shall start little by little tmr.. hafta complete chem june03 mcqs, 2002 maths a level paper n start studying a bit of econs liao. sigh, abt 6 more weeks to the big one.. must work harder liao.... TMR!!


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