Wednesday, June 29, 2005

just came back from mock camp.. super tired. had actually wanted to blog abt the camp but really too tired to go into that now.. wanna slp alr, just discussing boss stuff (again) with huiying. damn didnt get finance. shd have whacked la. now i got mktg g5 and thinking of changing to mktg g4 instead. tt class has 6 vacancies but im scared tt i cannot get it cos bids skyrocket in boss 1a. argh.


too tired to think alr la. only the conversations with jem n ron r keeping me awake for now. but konking out soon so i guess i shd just go to slp. zzzZZZZZzzzZZ


------ Sunday, June 26, 2005

hmmm i'm really a fickle-minded person huh. i wonder how long this one will last. heh. i get that somewhat familiar feeling creeping up on me and after so many encounters with it, sometimes i wonder when the familiar-feeling-part-2 will start creeping in. and the thing is..... i don really dare to think abt it cos it seems so..... unattainable. snap out of it alr! or maybe i shd follow tactic number 1 haha...


ohwell. ln just roped me in to help out for stageit's production. uhm hope it's gonna be alrite la.


somehow i dunoe if i'll be relieved if and when familiar-feeling-part-2 creeps in. what does it prove? something depressing i think. haiz. walk one step, see one step lor.


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still on the note of term 1 2005/06 (yeah yeah i'm obsessed with it), i realised that i'm gonna do 3 projects with jeremy and huiying and most likely 4 projects with yvonne! hahaaa.. now looking for proj mates for twc!


------ Friday, June 24, 2005

jiahui has found salvation by the name of victor sim! thanks ah, victor!
swapped my twc class to wed 12pm instead of monday 12pm! yay... no twc after AIS! twc after cat i can take it. twc aft ais..... can die man. so really really happy that i managed to swap my twc. the next best thing to doing twc in 3b lor.
so now i am free in august to do other things since i dont have 3b anymore.. shd i go back to help with asoc retreat leh? since i gd mood now hahaahahaaaaaaaa..


now just awaiting boss1 results to be out lor...


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I HATE BOSS. I F**KING HATE BOSS!


thought i finally sort out my classes now the fucking boss system come and chut pattern. TWC MY ASS LA. long story!


bottom line is, who dont have preassign TWC but want to do it in term 1 2005/06? swap with me pleaseeeeee.


but since the plan to take marketing with jeremy seah has already failed, i might as well save tt $600 bucks and do the preassigned TWC n drop marketing la hor? then do it in term 2 with jeremy soh.. good plan?


anyway, thanks huiying and yvonne for trying to make things not look that bad for me.. and to jeremy seah and esp jeremy soh for trying to help me sort out my mktg fiasco.. really appreciate it alot!



now on a brighter note, met up with nicholas today! finally! went to watch ghost train, which wasnt too good a show even though i found it scary at parts. thanks nic for bearing with me hahaa. then went to have a drink n have dinner and basically catch up la... great meeting him again.. missed him lots!


ok yeah tts abt it.. im gg to slp.. hopefully can figure out something tmr..


------ Thursday, June 23, 2005

yday was the last day of the soft skills course and i finally understand why ray and yv found the soft skills course really good. it is really a different experience from all the other courses i've been to. really bonded very well on the last day..
did the electric fence activity and this time, i was one of the first 2 to jump off so we didnt have support on the other side of the fence. there was a lot of issues of our clothes and body touching the fence so the first few of us kept jumping and jumping and jumping. hahaa. leg kinda hurts yday.. but kudos to youjin and sebastian who were my "chairs".. we ended with a great sharing session once again.. and of cos lots of talk abt bidding for courses together..


went to meet huying, yv and pearlyn for dinner last nite to discuss abt boss. initially thought we got a winnng formula alr but then started changing again at nite when we were chatting. last nite really quite chaotic.. i was split into so many parts discussing things with so many ppl.. yv, hy, pearlyn, anna, edmund, ray, ln, the 2 jeremys and i cant remember who else.. really hope to settle everything asap!
so far is
AIS G3 Mitchell Van Der Zahn Monday 830-1145
Income Tax G1 Khoo Teng Aun Tuesday 830-1145
Marketing G5 Jin Kyung Han Tuesday 1200-1330 and Thursday 1200-1330
CAT G12 Leong Thin Yin Wednesday 830-1145
Finance G8 Wang Leping Thursday 1530-1845
sighs im gonna have 3 morning classes consecutively.. but hope everyone can cfm soon!


------ Tuesday, June 21, 2005

had the 2nd day of soft skills today. yday was rather boring cos we had a different opinion on orientation n facilitation. although the grp kinda forged a bond, it felt kinda weird to me cos ultimately, we didnt know each other. today's games activities were much better cos we were made to come into close contact with each other in the bridges game activity.. and we also made an effort to go for lunch together so by the afternoon, we felt more bonded. plus we had quite a thrashing out session with stephen and the org comm so during the afternoon blindfold game activity, we were much more participative. so kudos to my bridges grp - jeremy, sebastian, youjin, robin, josephine, corina, corinne, caroline, lynette and yugui for an "exciting" grp huddle on top of the teeny weeny crate. sebastian esp for allowing me to step on his foot when he was wearing sandles and when the whole grp was leaning their weight towards our direction. it was kinda comical how the whole grp held onto each other.. the blindfold game activity was just hilarious. esp during the debrief when we were listening to each others' feelings.


ok enough of soft skills games activities.. tmr is the last day, really hope it'll be better than today's. oh.. jeremy (another one) told me their 3rd day is better is definitely more fun. hope so la!


okies i'm going off to read my book.. regretably, i'm still at the front few chapters for birdsong.. no time to read leh, though i must admit it does look promising. edwin.... i take ur book to china can???


------ Sunday, June 19, 2005

marchingontogether: in my father's den says:
hey u know something?
jIaHuI :. illusion never changed into something real says:
?
marchingontogether: in my father's den says:
pple always say there's a fine line between genius and retard
jIaHuI :. illusion never changed into something real says:
yeah yeah!
jIaHuI :. illusion never changed into something real says:
like john nash
jIaHuI :. illusion never changed into something real says:
n albert einstein
marchingontogether: in my father's den says:
haha
marchingontogether: in my father's den says:
and lim jiahui
jIaHuI :. illusion never changed into something real says:
HAHA
jIaHuI :. illusion never changed into something real says:
thanks ah!


i laughed for abt 10 minutes after that. cos of something said earlier actually. hohoho. amusing.


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hey josie.. i'm sorry but i dont think i know who u are. but i'm touched by ur words of encouragement. i dont even know that there are ppl whom i dont know reading my musings. actually, i agree with what u said abt in losing myself in work, i might find a stronger side of me. i have experienced it before, doing the very same thing i complained abt in my previous entry. but that being said, i dont feel fulfilment in doing it u know? i surprised myself completing some stuff but after i did it, i was like, "so what?". so what if i did it? i don get much recognition nor fulfilment. the recognition part is rather important to me. of cos, i don need much fanfare, all i needed was someone to know that i've done it and that i tried my best doing it although it might not be up to ur expectations and standards.
self fulfilment - now that's like, very important to me. why do i do the things i do? i've come to realise that it's because of self fulfilment. why do i volunteer? because it makes me feel at ease with everything, it makes me feel like i'm contributing back to the society that gave so much to me. why do i do kb? cos i feel fulfilled and refreshed and energised after a session. why do i persist with accountancy even though i didnt have much interest? because in a weird way, it gave me fulfilment when i managed to beat it. why did i go fot OT to ulu sepat? because it gives me a sense of accomplishment and fulfilment.
of cos i know not everything is about me, myself and whatever fulfilment i can find. but fulfilment comes in all forms. helping others, fighting for something, it all gives me different kinds of fulfilment.


but doing what i'm supposed to be doing now isnt.




okay enough of that.
huiying ah.. yes i remember what i asked u last nite. i also hoped u remembered the thing i said about what good is it being so clear about something? i spend so much of my time and energy trying to be clear of something but all i get is more muddled sometimes. so.. yeah u don always have to be clear ok. and YES, count ur blessings please. i told u i made a list of why i consider myself a lucky girl rite? well, i am at number 15 and i guess i can still go on if i think deeper but hey, if someone like me can make it to no.15, u definitely can do better lor. =)


------ Saturday, June 18, 2005

sometimes i get so sick of something that all i want to do is to detach myself from it all. but they keep contacting me. keep asking me to do stuff. and can i say no? i know they are shorthanded and it is not their fault that i get jaded of some stuff after a while but i just dont see the point of doing some things sometimes.
but i guess there's just no way of escaping it for now. i feel like sighing. SIGHHHH.


and to think i told myself not to sigh anymore! haha long story.


anyway. met kel to go for our usual sessions today and all i can say again is that yoga is just not for me. i cant balance and stretch in those funny positions for my life's worth. back to kb next week!


i finally went to pre order my harry potter book. yeah!


u are so lucky that u didnt even realise how lucky u are! why stop over something that's not even ur business?!


------

was reading my past entries cos i went to gb's blog and he was commenting that it's his blog's 2nd anniversary. so i went to see when mine is and began to read the june n july entries. and i realised i was so obsessed with lbm! hahahahaa. this amuses me so much. the econs tutor i used to dislike so much, i realised i talk abt her n how she likes to suan me a lot..
"jiahui ah, sit up str also can sleep in class.."
"jiahui, fail econs mcqs again ah? u got study or not?" (i GOT study okay!)
"aiyoh jiahui ah, how can u still aim for a passing grade now? at this time, must aim for level 3 or level 4 answer mah.." (when i was damn happy that i got 14/25 for an econs essay cos i passed it)
"jiahui ah.. whole class passed econs mcq leh, how come u fail ah?"
WAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAaa..



and i came across an entry where i noted that genia introduced "breathing" by lifehouse to me... i cant believe i forgot this song alr.. it's fantastic!


'Cause I am hanging on every word you say
And even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to
Sit outside Heaven's door and listen to you breathing
Is where I want to be, yeah...
Where I wanna be...


------ Thursday, June 16, 2005

8 days down, 2 to go!
and this reminds me that i havent received any pay from anything at all.. grrrr! i need the money! coldplay's album costs money, harry potter and the half blood prince costs money also!
ok this is making me sound like someone really really desperate for money...


anws, met kevin for dinner on tues.. spent a good 2 hrs+ eating and talking..
and i saw nicky when i was on my way home! so qiao.. we were just smsing on monday after not keeping in contact for quite some time then next thing i know it, we met at the mrt station! and i think he's gotten thinner haha..


met up with kelvina and bain today after a looongggg time.. great seeing them as usual! went to watch mr and mrs smith - it's a great show! it's humourous and exciting. doesnt hurt that a certain mr pitt is so drool-worthy!
went over to indochine to have a drink after dinner. 3 best pals just talking over hoegaarden.. life just doesnt get any much better than this.. love ya, babes!


time to slp zzZZZZzzzzzZzzzzZZZZzZzzz


------ Monday, June 13, 2005

i just wanna say......


congrats edwin!!


next time supper must come n pick us up okays?!


------ Sunday, June 12, 2005

the latest guy i cant take my eyes off..





*wooooot*



eat ur heart out!
ian somerhalder, or boone in "lost"


and the singer i cant get enough of besides coldplay... rachel yamagata. she rocks.
go listen to "the reason why" and "worn me down" if u wanna get a taste of what she's like.. all natural and nice...


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spent some me-time today. me-time u say? when i hardly go out now? haha YEAH. past 2 weekends have been spent slogging my ass off working and all that, thought it's time i spend a weekend doing things for myself instead of by myself.


went for kickboxing in the afternoon and i must say that going for rasol's class after not kb-ing for one month is almost like committing suicide. but i like it. feels really great to sweat it out, to focus so fully on something, the rhythmic breathing, the punching and kicking, the adrenaline rush, and of cos the muscle aches that follows. really great.


then went to replenish some stationaries and to buy coldplay's album. like finally! then went grocery shopping.. saw some madagascar collectibles on the cereal boxes and i was so amused that i bought the cereals as well as milk to boot. hahahaaa. impulse buying.. nothing beats it!


then met edwin for a while in the evening to pass him "lost".. yeah lost is out via ibm record now. kel, u're after edwin k? =)
anw, nice seeing ed again. yeah u're much tanner now! looks gooooood! thanks for walking me back and thanks for the book! actually i've just started reading a book by john conolly now but since u highly recommend birdsong, i'll read it first! cos u know i've always trusted ur taste ahahahaaaa..


ok i'm listening to coldplay's X&Y now and a little part of me melts when chris martin starts singing.. esp when he goes "and i will try to fix u". ahhhh. i want so much to believe what he's singing.................


------ Friday, June 10, 2005

i've been randomly surfing friendster to look at ppl i havent kept in contact with for some time.. and i saw kevin. mymy he's getting really droolworthy! too bad he's in malaysia and like so far away. the mixed blood in him is like, making his features really nice ahahhaaa. and kevin yuen also. tall n cute as always. joycelyn i dunoe if u're reading this but... he's looking gd! hahahaa..


ok yeah, i have a really weird dream last nite. it's so weird i cant really even begin to describe it. in short, i was running away from a r/s. like HA HA HA. tell me what's new.
ohwell at least i havent had the tooth dropping freaky dreams i used to have.


u know, working with american kids.... i reckon i can do a pretty good imitation of their accent now.


i am listening to travis's "why does it always rain on me" now.... nice melancholic song. love it.


------ Thursday, June 09, 2005

sometimes kids are so irritating.. but they are so cute at the same time. especially when they are little girls and they come with an american accent. kids from SAS are different frm those in the mainstream schooling in the sense that they are really more outspoken in class (the lecturer asked for 2 volunteers and more than half the class raised their hands), they are louder but at the same time, they are really spoiled and they lack this precious thing called discipline. sigh.
please let me not get too irritated with them. pls let their cuteness negate their naughtiness. pleaseeee.


hmmm. just gotta say sorry to kevin for not being able to make it.
and thanks to ray for chatting.
and HELLO KELVINA BABE!!!
=)


------ Tuesday, June 07, 2005

chatted with youyi and i realised i tell him things i havent been able to say easily normally. so thanks, youyi. thanks pal.


sometimes i feel like i'm looking at myself from the outside of me.
sometimes i feel like i'm being someone i'm not.
sometimes i feel like i'm trying too hard but it is as if i've not tried hard enough.
sometimes.


dont u feel that everyone is actually a stranger to everyone else? for every 1 thing u think u know abt someone, there are maybe 5 things u dont know.
yeah, everyone is a stranger to everyone else.
hello, stranger.


------ Monday, June 06, 2005

the new job is a blast. easy money! hahhaaaaa..
the kids attend lectures in the morning from 9-12pm, then go for a 2-hr lunch, then do work frm 2-5pm. so really, i only have things to do from 2-5pm. and the best part is, they realised that the kids cant really concentrate on doing work for 3 hrs at a go so they are looking at the probability of afternoon lectures too.. wheeeee.


the kids are mostly from singapore american school. which means they have the classic american accents. rather cute. today my grp consisted of kids from singapore, america, india and even korea. quite fun actually.


oh did i mention today's topics are on logic in problem solving.. it's like being in an AS class! now i know just how hard it is to be an AS prof. no joke trying to explain logic to people new to the concept.



but that being said, i still want these 2 weeks to pass by faster!


------

work at the world book fair has come to an end.. it's a bit boring and dry but at the same time, rather entertaining at times. got to know some really nice ppl, esp dionne who is so like me, it's kind of amazing. and then there're the 2 guys from the 2 booths at either end of me. the one selling shi wan ge wei shen me and some oldies cds who i was intrigued with for a while, and yongming, the one at the other side selling printers and ink catridges. quite funny at times.
i dont understand how ppl can stand doing sales for so long, i think it's one of the most unfulfilling thing to do on a long term basis! it's true, salesppl like to use this technique called "smoke".. dont know something? just say out of stock. want to get more sales, just say all compatible with windows xp. gahhh.
took photos with my colleagues, might post them up if i'm in the mood la.


starting my new job tmr. gosh it sounds so blardy tough even though it's supposed to be maths for kids aged 9-12. ever heard of the bridges of konigsburg, graph theory and euler's formula? how abt combinatorics? axioms and logic? yeah well neither have i. wish me luck. i'm gonna be the worst TA there is.


going to sleep. bone tired.


------ Saturday, June 04, 2005

of addictions


i am hopelessly addicted to "LOST". it's a bloody brilliant show, i tell u. even though i am bone tired after another 10 hour workday and i have a 12-hr day tmr, i cant tear myself away from watching lost. even after i sweared last nite that i will sleep early tonite. I AM HOPELESS. i'm at episode 18 now and i cant stop! i willingly forgo chatting with people i'd normally like to chat to just to watch lost. ARGH. a part of me wants to keep watching and know the ending but on the other hand, this will mean that i'm nearing the finale soon and i dont want the show to end! oh no!! and now i'm spending one para talking about the show when i'm supposed to be sleeping!


and i am very intrigued by the guy at the next booth. he looks so so familiar, like we've met somewhere before. today he wore a pink formal shirt and he looks so metro, and kinda nice haha. no i dont like him or anything like that. just that i'm intrigued. it's almost like we've met somewhere.


------ Friday, June 03, 2005

i wish i have something more interesting to say but the fact is i dont. so what if i lead a no lifer's life? the interesting things others have to say - read them if u want to. if u know me enough, the things i say may seem normal but some of them do have a second meaning. i know it and i dont think alot of people will know it. in fact, i dont think anyone knows them. i am just not that into showcasing every aspect of my life.
and i have no idea what am i trying to justify now too.


i wish i have something amusing to say and in fact, i do. someone searched "kiveli filmeridis" on came to my site! like wtf??
i'm laughing as i type this.


------

we reached the sales target today yeah! today we were super hyper. we = dionne, me and chenghui. oh well. hahaaa. i think after this job of mine, i can be a pro story teller for the ugly duckling, pinocchio, hansel n gretel and this weird story called little claus and big claus. i hear them so many times a day. and i can prob do a voiceover for shi wan ge wei shen me (100000 whys). and the chinese oldies. i made the guy at the nxt booth promise to play another song tmr alr. he better keep his promise - cos i'm going nuts.
ahahahaaaaaa...


acty nothing much in particular to say. i saw ray's list of 50 things ppl rarely know abt me, i might do sth similar too.. it sounds fun. and i bet i can come up with more than 50. hahaha.


oh yah, hantu from the taggie.. are u THE hantu? the san ge ban one?? how did u get here??? i miss u all alot leh! i miss u alot!! i miss us!!!


------ Wednesday, June 01, 2005

empty vessels sailing by
what becomes of the seamen then?
washed away by time and tide
to a place i'll never find
everything just sail me by
nothing stops.


dont u feel like u've been neglected by time sometimes? that despite your best efforts, things always come to naught more often than not? which comes back to the age old question.. when is my good enough? and i've reached my answer at last: my good is never enough.


sometimes all i feel like doing is giving up.


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