Tuesday, January 31, 2006

happy chinese new year!


an update of what went on -
cny eve - went shopping with bain and then to gran's house for reunion dinner.
chu 1 - to dad's side of the family for house visiting, then to mum's side of the family.. rushed marketing report (sigh)
chu 2 - slept in, went to gran's house to play mj.. then to ford's place for GO/ACF gathering.. had (literally) mushroom steamboat with me, tim, ford, min and gerard being the main eaters. drank chivas n beer n played cards.
chu 3 - jing en's place with je, weijian, huiying, yvonne n pearlyn. rushed marketing powerpoint (sigh again) and played cards and attempted to tell fortunes. then to gerard's place for another round of GO/ACF dinner. left early though. i think everyone was tired.


and now that the cny hols are over... back to work:
1) 12% marketing presentation and report on thurs
2) 5 weeks worth of audit readings (DARN!)
3) 10% ethics written assignment due on friday


on another note, i'm doing patron's day.. haha yes i have a death wish and a huge inclination to let my readings go to rot.


and someone should really lock me up in a room with no internet access and no handphones, full of cans of coffee and mentos lime mint or chlorets, with all my readings. piece of shit... i have TONS of readings to do. i can't imagine 2nd half of the term when 5.5 sets in.. i think i really might just die.
so someone should really really lock me up in a room so that i don't go around doing another event cos i really can't afford it anymore.
if my grades suffer, i can already imagine my parents telling me "i told you so".
but school life is so much more than mugging.


in the best muggerish spirit i can muster for now -
i'm off to do my ethics readings so that i do the piece of shit written assignment.
(someone asked me what my new year resolution is for this year. i said "drink less and curse less". guess it's another year of unfulfilled resolutions. sigh.)


------ Sunday, January 29, 2006

to someone whom i always turn to for advice, regardless of whether u realise it or not;
to someone who was always there for me even at my lowest;
to someone who always takes care of me when i'm unable to do so myself, one who holds my hands, wipes my tears and everything else;
to someone who encourages me to stand up again;
to someone who eats earth-shaking, comet-falling bk meals with me;
to someone who has the ability to make me laugh at everything in life;
to someone i know i can always depend on -
these are just some of the things that i realised you have done for me over these short 1.5 yrs.. so now it's my turn. take great care of yourself alright. no matter what you do or decide, you'll always have my support.


just thought i'd tell you that again.
now it's my turn to be there for you.
*heart


------ Saturday, January 28, 2006

all of a sudden she feels like a bearer of a number of things. but it's ok.. sometimes being in such a position makes me feel more in touch. like someone important.


just in a moment of reflection now.
just talked about closets door being difficult to close sometimes..


Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart


Tell me yours secret and ask me your questions
Oh let's go back to the start
Running in circles, coming up tails
Heads on a science apart


Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard
Oh take me back to the start


I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart


Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing our tails
Coming back as we are


Nobody said it was easy
Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard


I'm going back to the start


.
.
.
happy cny, everybody.


------ Wednesday, January 25, 2006

i took a freak fall yesterday evening and landed pretty badly on my right knee and left foot. my right knee now has a bruise in the shape of the australian continent and my left foot... let's just say that i was lucky that i didn't sprain it. just a huge bruise on the outstep that hurts like the devil. it was so bad i couldn't put any weight on it at all. it felt much better today. i progressed from hopping to hobbling. dumb freak fall.


have u ever felt this way... the feeling that when something comes/happens, what you've gotta do is to hold on to it with all u can, hustle your way in and hang on for the ride for as long as it lasts.
that's the way with life now innit? hanging on for as long as it lasts.
for everything will eventually pass.
it works both ways - for sad stuff, everything will pass. u just gotta ride the rough patches out. for happy stuff, everything will pass. all u gotta do is to hang on for as long as u can. hang on and never let go for as long as you can.


saw roxanne, zhiyang, ford and min in school just now. great seeing them, esp rox.
spent some time hanging in the library (yes, the library) with min. the girl's my alter ego i think. someone i would envision myself to be if i had done some things another way. i like the honesty and the no-holds-barred with her.


------ Tuesday, January 24, 2006

i am supposed to be studying for my 15% marketing quiz NOW but i feel that i just need to get this done.. i really don't know why but i just feel restless without doing it.. yesyes the Grand Opening.


I really enjoyed myself doing G.O. granted, it wasn't the easiest of events. in fact, things were so messy it's one of the messiest things i've been involved with. but precisely because of that, i feel that we all shared a tighter bond - the late nights, the long meetings and the suppers.. when we are not working, we seriously go mad telling stories and laughing at everyone and everything.


it is so, so gratifying to see the Grand Opening executed in one almost flawless piece. it is definitely the first time i am doing a lot of things thru this GO. certain moments i wont forget for a long, long time:-
1) getting everyone's attention when like 90% of the performers are taller than me
2) the reaction from everyone when i relayed the announcement of "dry weather plan"
3) sebs telling me i did a great job
sebs telling me that i did a great job was especially momentous and significant. he was my mentor after all and what better is the feeling when your mentor commends u? the feeling is priceless.


we then had a farewell dinner for jennifer on saturday and after some scouting by paik and me, we managed to find swenson's who was the only outlet able to accomodate nearly 20 of us at such short notice. dinner was madness. we had about 4 rounds on average. i had 4 - starters, main course and 2 rounds of desserts. wahahahhaa. it was totally, totally hilarious. lots of stories swapped: suanning ford and tim with the "I am from SA, the biggest club in smu"; ford and his $4-a-night service; geraldine and me sitting at the "halfway line"... we were seriously laughing like hyenas and basically making a lot of noise and irritating the hell out of the other patrons there..
then we went to this ulu partyworld to sing.. it was fun too. basically, a night to remember..


sunday was bain darling's 21st and we had a surprise party for her.. i'm really glad the party was a surprise for you my dear.. i'm so so happy for you and everything in your life. there's really nothing much more i wish than to see u have everything u want in your life now.. happy 21st birthday, darling!!
had a great time catching up with si jia and shalynn also.. next up is hongyi's already.. someone help me, i'm going broke!
oh yah, have to commend that my twin was so nice to me on sunday. he accompanied me to get bain's present then drove us both back to his house to get the chocs and drove down to pasir ris costa sands.. then after the party, he drove me back even though he stays in bedok! how nice! thanks, edwin!


today was pretty tiring.. was supposed to go gym with min today but circumstances didn't really permit.. next week, min, next week!
tmr nite supposed to go mambo with the acf gals but damnit, i just remembered i have a 7-chapters, 15% marketing quiz on thursday. mambo my foot la mambo. another time then.
not to mention that i haven't been keeping up with my audit, ethics and comp law readings. shucks.


seems like it's back to reality huh. hello, life.


------

today when i was on the bus home, i can't stop smiling to myself for no good reason.. it's just some inexplicable feeling of being happy. it was really great - haven't felt this sense of fulfillment and happiness in some time.
the last time i felt inexplicably happy was the episode with jmsh but let's not go there cos this current topic is definitely out of bounds.
i need this more.. the sense of fulfillment. i don't need other boosters right now, just as long as i know i always have you guys for now. thanks for giving me that.


i read the letter from margaret to jenn.. i swear it can make me cry. we'll miss you jennifer. i went to osl today to return the special access passes to meng and it's so weird to see jenn's once-cluttered desk empty. where's jenn, i thought... i can't wait for round 2.


i want this feeling to last, if only for a little while longer. and though i know some areas can never be visited or revisited, i'll take them for now. sometimes the thought of it is all that keeps me going for now. do you know??


------ Monday, January 23, 2006

i'm back...


normalcy officially returns on Monday 23 Jan 12pm onwards.


all i can say is that the G.O. Express has been 1 helluva ride. and i loved every minute of it. to the G.O. Comm, thank you for the ride.


lots of things to update btw - G.O., the aftermath, bain darling's bday and how my twin was so nice to me today... i'm off for now.


more later.


------ Sunday, January 15, 2006

the sense of longing for something good never dies


yeah i'm sure everyone can relate to that at one point or another. something, anything. the cloest friend, a day without rain, a day with rain, a smooth ride, a perfect lover.. something, anything.


please, shell, go away. i don't want to retreat behind you anymore. life is just so much more.


------ Saturday, January 14, 2006

it's the exhilaration that accompanies an event that pushes me to do event after event. the late hours, the little sleep, the boring meetings.. yes we bitch about it but deep down we know that we have really no complaints about it. cos we all share the ultimate goal - to make it a success.


i'm glad with the range of stuff i do in smu. in the words of david, it's a thankless job, it's sai kang, there's not enough substantial benefits - whatever. it's the process that i am really drawn to. knowing more people, learning more things, the biggest factor - self fulfillment and the chance to discover new things about myself. all i can say is that you'll never know it unless you do it.


had a great late lunch at jack's place with ford, zhiyang, roxanne, geraldine, leonard and gerard just now after our meeting. it was hilarious. or should i say ford was hilarious. and poor geraldine keep getting arrowed by ford. jokes about the staff (office of student life ppl like geraldine) abusing students (poor ppl like the rest of us).
1 more thing about working with the osl staff - they are real friendly and funny.


ok i'm dead tired. no work tonight. i'm gonna watch 'house' and whatever catches my interest now.
and oh btw, jesse spencer is looking better with each episode. wahahhahaa.


缓缓飘落的枫叶像思念
我点燃烛火温暖岁末的秋天
极光掠过天边 被风掠过想你的容颜
我把爱烧成了落叶 却唤不回熟悉的那张脸
缓缓飘落的落叶像思念
为何挽回要赶在冬天来之前
爱你穿越时间 两行来自秋末的眼泪
让爱渗透了地面 我要的就是你在我身边


------ Wednesday, January 11, 2006

busy busy busy


this term is gonna be a busy term for me.
- busy with grand opening stuff now
- doing 5.5 mods this term so will be busy with readings, assignments, projects and papers
- gonna join salsa intermediate classes this term
- busy with AMT stuff, how busy i don't know yet
- busy with programming stuff: am doing BBB (2 hours per week), Geri's show (3 hours per week) and earphoria (6 hours a month)
i'm so busy that i do not have a common time to meet with my ltb groups. i can already forsee a crap evaluation coming up SIGH.


on hindsight though, this week is almost like the hols to me due to hari raya haji cos i will only have 1 morning class on friday.


i had a weird dream this morning. i got disrupted by a phone call early this morning. when i went back to sleep, i dreamt that i got up to chat on msn. and i was chatting to e. i answered your question in my dream - and the answer is a yes. wahahahaa. a dumb, dumb dream and a freaking honest answer, if i may say.


aites, gotta go sch soon. ahhh the bane of me.
=yawns=


------ Monday, January 09, 2006

E says:
ur chinese sentence has no meaning
J - 我不敢想得太多因为我一个人 says:
it is a sentence form a song la
it makes sense when u hear the song
acty it makes alot of sense to me leh
when u are alone then sometimes u really don dare to think too much
E says:
one person alone would think more
cos nothing to do alr
J says:
yes true but then there are also alot of things u wont dare to think abt
maybe only ppl like me will understand
E says:
more like... dan ni gu dan ni hui xiang qi shui ni xiang bu xiang zao ge ren lai pei
J says:
no wont
dang i gu dan i don xiang qi a particular person
i xiang qi things tt happened in the past
n then there will come some stuff tt u really wont want to think
E says:
wahhh
J says:
yeah quite screwed rite
i don even know my past sometimes... cant fathom why things happened the way they did
E says:
no la
different way of thinking loh
i guess people grow up differently at different pace
soo... there's nothing one can do but let time be the intermediary
certainly one has to have the end in mind... so that time will play a part in getting to that end
if not, it'll still be a waste of time


well said.
it's a fresh way to look at things, i guess.
thank you.


------

knight in tarnished armour


i was reading timmortal's blog and i saw a comment about knights in tarnished armour. tim himself is an absolute knight in tarnished armour. no doubt, a knight in shining armour sounds mighty good and fairytale-like. but me... i think i will very much prefer a knight in tarnished armour. as long as the armour is real and not a fake front for a knight, i'll like my knight to come in a tarnished armour. it's more real and on my selfish part, i won't feel so pressurised to be the nice, good girl that the nice, good world expects everyone to be.


------ Sunday, January 08, 2006

pearlyn jio-ed me to be facilitators for the Amazing Food Race last week and i thought, what the heck. since i havent planned for anything, might as well go for it. might be fun. AFR was yesterday and sans the miserable weather (thank goodness it was no thunderstorm though), it was kinda fun bringing 5 foreign students around eating stuff like curry puffs, kaya toasts, chicken rice, tau huay and roti prata. the ppl in my grp came from norway, poland, austria, myanmar and china. pretty fun la.


after the AFR ended, daniel and thomas invited us to a house party held at one of the other's apartment at aljunied. so andy, chris ho and i went. it started out a normal chill-out affair, comparing cultures and drinking (gasps) beer. then more and more ppl came and it became a full fledged party. it was darn noisy with like 50 people (at least) trying to speak above each other's voices and above the thumping music. it's a wonder the police didn't come.


and by goodness, they do know how to throw a house party. and they gave a whole new definition to "beer drinking". i think on the average, they had about 10 cans of carlsberg each. no kidding. every surface was covered with beer can. 7-11 made a small fortune man. someone switched off the lights at midnite and the dancing began. the music played was everything from eurotrance to r&b to house to electronic to funk.. it was really pretty good. there was this pretty drunk guy, upon knowing that i know basic salsa, lead me thru so many spins that we were spinning like a tornado - hitting so many people, that is!
i left at abt 3 and the party was just about to adjourn for food. they have too much energy la!



examining our clues before we set off



1st stop - kaya toast from killiney kopitiam at somerset
from left: jianqiao from china, daniel from poland, thinzer from myanmar, thomas from norway and chris from austria.



2nd stop - hainanese chicken rice from this place at novena that i can't remember.



3rd stop - curry puffs from selera restaurant at mackenzie road



4th stop - tau huay from rochor road



mid point stop - doing the limbo!



5th stop - prata from thondaman curry restaurant near tekka mall



at the house party - with daniel



at the house party - with thomas


okay that's about all the pictures i have with me. there are probably alot more with the other exchange people but i doubt i will ever lay my hands on them. 1 of them includes me standing at 1.85m tall with the help of the couch. wahahhaha.


=peaceout=


------

zj's 21st party..
at aloha loyang bungalow which is super big. met up with bain, hongyi, yvonne n jingzhong to go down to aloha loyang together. met si jia there also and eventually the other people like desmond, chin ta, shihui, wanxin, weizhi, edwin n even guobin came. not bad.. had fun talking to different people, going gaga over zj's 21 presents by kian n basically seeing people i've not seen in some time. pictures up..



with the birthday gal, zijun



with yvonne



jingzhong



hongyi and bain



unglam shot looking silly hahaha



with miss pretty babe shihui



and of cos with my twin edwin poh.
(eh yes he looks super young in this photo!)


------ Saturday, January 07, 2006

i was feeling apprenhensive today.


apprenehensions. (if there's such a word)
no. 1: when i saw you walk into class today, my heart stopped momentarily. 'no way', i thought. what was i to do? and when u said hi after class ended, i remembered why i feel so screwed.
no. 2: i was frankly dreading running into you today. truth is, i do not have anything to say to u at all. turns out, my dread(s) were not really founded. but still, the possibility of it (still) fills me with dread. i do not know why things turn out this way too. and i have a feeling this goes both ways.


had a nice time at zijun's 21st birthday party. happy birthday, zijun! pictures up later.


------ Wednesday, January 04, 2006

ok i might sound like a freak but comp law seems to be rather interesting. and ltm/ltb is fine la.
i'm suffering from post-hols blues. i just felt like puking for the whole of yesterday and it got real bad at night.
sitting at killiney's yesterday with hui ying and pearlyn, i realised something once again. something so obvious and so significant but something i find it hard to do time and again.
and so it's back to the world of metaphors and twisted truths
i thought i am well versed in the art of moving on as if nothing happened. but i might be wrong. i can move on. but not as if nothing happened. i confess. i can't help but look.
i really do want to keep the so-called resolutions for 2006.


------ Monday, January 02, 2006

《恋爱-ING》 ~ 五月天


陪你熬夜 聊天到爆肝也没关系
陪你逛街 逛成扁平足也没关系
超感谢你 让我从生整个ORZ
让我从新认识 LOVE
(L-O-V-E, L-O-V-E!)


恋爱-ING HAPPY-ING
心情就像是坐上一台喷射器
恋爱-ING 改变-ING
改变了黄昏 黎明 有你都心跳到不行


你是空气 但是好闻胜过了空气
你是阳光 但是却能照进半夜里
水能载舟 也能煮粥 喂饱了生命
你就是维他命 LOVE
(L-O-V-E, L-O-V-E!)


恋爱-ING HAPPY-ING
心情就像是坐上一台喷射器
恋爱-ING 改变-ING
改变了黄昏 黎明 有你都心跳到不行


未来某年某月某日某时某分某秒某人某地某种永远的心情
不会忘记此刻 LOVE
(L-O-V-E, L-O-V-E! L-O-V-E, L-O-V-E!)


恋爱-ING HAPPY-ING
心情就像是坐上一台喷射器
恋爱-ING 改变-ING
改变了黄昏 黎明 有你都心跳到不行
黄昏 黎明 整个都恋爱-ING!


what a happy and upbeat song.. i sure wouldn't mind if my 2006 is as upbeat and happy as this!


my timetable thus far:-
monday- marketing with sebastian (hopefully)
tues- company law with pearlyn, yvonne, hui ying, weiting, jing en, wei jian n goodness knows who else, leadership thru mentoring with ray and youyi
thurs- tax planning with pearlyn, yvonne, hui ying, larissa and i wonder who else, marketing with sebastian
fri- audit with pearlyn and yvonne, ethics n social responsibility with edmund
there there... the same gang once again. jeremy soh the sotong for pang seh-ing marketing. and no more jeremy seah and shireen! (shireen... salsa intermediate riteeeee?) and the same sore thumb sticking out... talk cock mods like ethics n a predicted extremely boring mod in audit. aye.


here's to a new school term - may we all get through it in 1 piece again.


------ Sunday, January 01, 2006

happy new year


it's a cosy and quiet new year, just the way i like it. spent ny eve with kel and serene at serene's place. we were in our utmost lok kok-ness.. tshirts, shorts, specs and caps. went to tampines mall to catch 'the family stone', of which i thought the male lead, dermot mulroney, to be real hot. he's 38 btw. right. back to serene's place in sk, catching dvd, eating junk n drinking all sorts of funny stuff, playing cards n dares..


2006 is here. i hope this yr will be real different from 2005. 2006... what a year it can become.


not really making too many new year resolutions this year cos resolutions seldom get fulfilled. so these are the more attainable ones i guess.


1) cut down on beer. the dratted thing known as the greater omentum. sighs.
2) believe, believe, believe.
3) receptive, receptive, receptive.
4) trust.


got a bunch of dvds from serene. am off to watch them now.
=peaceout=


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